DATING SKEPTICISM QUESTION:

I got an email that was basically bashing the whole internet dating advice industry. It was saying that the online dating "gurus" are just basically con artists out to give bad advice, so that it won't work and the guys will keep coming back to them for more and more of it. They likened it to the diet industry, where they sell fat people diet products that don't work, to keep them fat, so they'll keep buying more and more in an effort to lose weight. The email said that the whole thing was about profit and making money, not to actually help people.

I have followed your advice for a long time now, and ... Most everything you teach seems to make good sense to me. I'm sure there is a lot of crap out there too though. Anybody and everybody can put up a web site these days.

But the email did make me wonder. I'd like to hear what you have to say about all this.

Thanks for the help.
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CARLOS:
WARNING: The opinion you're about to read is not for the weak or faint of heart.


Everything in life can be looked at in life in one of two ways:

1) You can gain something from it

or

2) You're just being swindled.

Yes, there are a lot of guys who are giving out lame advice, or stuff that's not terribly original.

Yes, there are people who are giving advice that makes you think they've gotta be smoking some SERIOUS dope.

Yes, there are some guys (and girls) out there trying to make a fast buck.

My question is this...

You said: "But the email did make me wonder."

WHAT exactly did that email make you wonder?

That you had made a bad decision to start on the path of self-discovery and self-improvement?

That you can't be successful with women?

Anyone that tells you that is full of shit. Anyone that tells you that you can't make your life better is a f*cking idiot. (I should stop beating around the bush...)

They're preying on your sense of "remorse" that we all fall victim to. We second-guess ourselves all the time.

- Did I do the right thing?

- Shouldn't I have asked someone first?

- Should I have waited?


The sad fact is that most people never get anywhere in life because they refuse to put their foot down and DO anything of merit. To take a risk. To dare to step away from the crowd.

They avoid making decisions in the deluded belief that it helps them avoid failure.

And instead they wind up never making any success, which is failure by default.

Then these same people sit back and crush all of your hopes, pretending they know it all already. They're the cynics of the world, the critics who belittle everyone else who dares to go after what they want in life.

I have a saying:

"Those who have given up on their dreams will do their best to discourage you from your own."

You know, I could come up with a negative for every situation in life that comes along.

- Gas stations are really just a kind of drug dealer, keeping you addicted to your need to drive expensive and polluting automobiles.

- Gyms and fitness clubs are all just out to make money off you by convincing you that you can really lose weight, when in fact if you just walked a few miles each day you'd be in just as good shape.

What do YOU believe?

Answer: Whatever you CHOOSE to.

The only thing that ensures failure is failing to try in the first place, or giving up.


This garbage never bothers me personally because I'm here to pave the way for you to achieve what you want from life. I give you the tools to make your life what YOU decide you want from it.

And I'll stand by that until the day I leave this rock.

You know the Truth when you hear it. So just stay tuned and keep listening.


"No one ever erected a statue to a critic." - Zig Ziglar

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