DATING ADVICE FOR MEN QUESTION:

From your excellent materials that I have read there is no question in my mind that what you say is absolutely SPOT ON. I have a degree in psychology and can confirm the validity of your superb scholarship. I have never been a wuss with women.

If anything, I'm rather emotionally detached from women. I don't mean unfriendly. I know how to flirt, and seem to attract the attention of very young women, usually between 20 - 25. (I'm 44). No matter how beautiful a woman is I will never give my power away, compliment her or kiss ass. The trouble is I can't tell whether they fancy me or not, and do not fully understand the underlying mechanics of how to make a woman be attracted to me.

Personally, I still think women are unconsciously attracted to dominant powerful men. Good looks definitely helps as does height.

Meanwhile I have passed your newsletters to dozens of guys I know, as I believe that contemporary Western society conditions most men to be complete wimps and wussies with women. You know the completely spineless "nice guy" syndrome, where most guys kiss up to women in order to try and make women become attracted to them.

As an example that you can incorporate into your fabulous newsletter here is a real life situation from me:

I was seeing this stunning 21 year old woman. But on our last date she completely flaked me out. So, in my usual Mediterranean way, I told her that I don't tolerate disrespect from women when it comes to dates. Breaking a date, is, in my opinion one of the worst crimes a woman can inflict on a guy.

Most guys would have wimped out and said: "Oh that's okay, maybe we can re-arrange another time." For standing my ground she replied that she doesn't want to see me any more. My response, who cares. Just move on.

I wonder if you can help/advise me?

Many women have said I am attractive and good-looking. I am 6 feet 2 inches tall, weigh about 250 ib, work out regularly, and am built like an American football quarterback. The trouble is that whenever I meet a woman that I classify as gorgeous, my gut instinct tells me that they only want to be friends.

I'm not a wuss in any sense of the word. In fact I have a dominant, confident and assertive personality, both with women and guys. No guy walks all over me, not even these Alpha males you talk about. What do you think I'm doing wrong?

I once heard one very attractive woman say to some other women:

"You can only go so far with him."

Unfortunately, I didn't ask her to elaborate. Any ideas on how I can attract hot women and make them feel attracted to me?
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CARLOS:


I would have been curious as to what she meant, but I suspect that you're broadcasting something with your attitude or body language that they find either intimidating or off-putting.

Something else that you might want to think about is that other guys are probably not going to try to out-alpha a 6' 2", 250 pound quarterback. Physical appearance does affect how we handle people in social situations. A lot of guys are probably intimidated.

I suspect that you're coming across as TOO Alpha. Yes, it can happen.

What I mean by this is that you're giving off an aura that's too much for most women. Your physical appearance demands that you take a slightly different approach than the average guy.

You must be more VULNERABLE with women.

The bigger and more physically intimidating a guy is, the more a woman wants to see the "teddy bear" in him. THAT is what ultimately attracts her to him.

So when you interact with women, you need to understand that they're already assuming that you're a grunting, beer-swilling, aggro guy, but what they want to discover is that you've got a soft spot (or two) somewhere.

My friends usually reveal something about themselves in conversation that acts as a hook. They mention something about how they like to write poetry in their spare time, or they play with their cat, or they like to catch "The View" every so often.

This kind of unexpected side interest serves to give you more dimensions as an Alpha Male. Not just a big lunk, which is what a lot of women assume.

Make sense?

Just keep up the Alpha attitude of taking-no-crap, but balance it with a softer approach on the surface. Demonstrate an intellectual side of your personality that they would not expect.

alpha man | how to talk to women | approach women | dating advice for men