Is this guy losing this woman's attraction?

Hi Carlos,

I've been reading your news letters for about a year now ... I've actualy found [a particular entry] the most useful, because of what you say about it being an entire mind set. Not, a bunch sneaky ways to get a women into bed. From what you say, it is a lifestyle, which you emphasise far more than the other entries. The whole idea that you have to have this strong sense of self-respect for yourself so true in ALL areas of your life, not just women.

That definitely has had the biggest influence on me. The confidence it has given me is enormous, and yes I have been having problems with this girl, but overal, since I started reading, i've never looked back.

I've got a small issue i'd like to share with you. I've been dating a girl for 5 months now, however I'm beginning to be concerned with her interest levels. Initially everything was good.

However recently we've been to a few parties together and most of the people are her school friends, who I get on with, but don't really know very well. Then she just leaves me to go off and have a laugh with them.

This I don't have a huge problem, but little things in her body language suggest a disinterest in me, and an interest in other guys. Now I know this sounds like I'm becoming insecure, but come on! if you're going to a party with your boyfriend you don't just leave them as soon as you walk in! So I kept myself calm, and went of to have fun with some of her other friends and danced with some other girls. Not that I don't mind too much, but I get the feeling I'm being treated as a commodity, and I don't like it.

Recently, she showing all the signs of strong attraction towards this other guy, and I really had to just take a walk, I didn't know quite what to do. Every time I think of this it makes me feel so angry at myself for letting this happen, that fact that I now would appear to be second best (and I hate coming second in anything!).

Honestly, I feel like dumping her right now, but I can't as I'm going on holiday with her to finland in two weeks.What do you think I should do?

Thanks
AC
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CARLOS ANSWERS:

There's a lot of emotional dynamics to understand in this game, too. It's not something that a lot of other guys cover, because admitting the emotionality of it somehow makes you feel a little "girly man."

But it won't.

I'm immersed right now in some research regarding emotional motivations, and I'll be adding this understanding to the content of the Advanced Coaching program. But suffice to say, right now, you are using anger to avoid the feelings of sadness that are harder to deal with.

It's a universal defense mechanism that men and women both use.

Yes, you are starting to sound like you're losing your frame and self-confidence based on her reaction.

Look, it's normal to want a woman to reciprocate her feelings. But the honest truth of the matter is that you can't MAKE her feel anything. All you can do is act based on PRINCIPLE, and then invest a little energy in giving her a fun experience with you.

After that, you simply use the strategies for demonstrating your Alpha Man character, and hope this girl is smart enough (and SANE enough) to make the right decision. If she doesn't, NEXT!

Jealousy will come up from time to time, as it has with this new guy that's spiking her interest.

But I guarantee you this: If you have other prospects you are working on at the same time, you won't feel so jealous! You'll be in an "abundance" mindset, instead of scarcity.

Hey, you've got a competitive streak. You don't like to lose.

That's good!

But beating yourself up over the one that got away will only set your attitude back even further, and cause unnecessary emotional turmoil.

Spank yourself, and then move on!

It's time to learn from your mistakes, correct them, and then find the next girl that you can get on with.

And let this be a lesson to never pre-commit to travel with a woman unless she's YOURS. (i.e., you're sleeping with her and you're a "couple.")

I say you dump her anyway, go to Finland ALONE, and pickup women there. There's no reason you should throw more good money after bad on someone like this. Don't ruin your Holiday.

Make it what you WANT it to be...

And if you want to learn the advanced Communication strategies that I use to get women interested and KEEP them interested, you should look at this: Alpha Man Conversation & Persuasion

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