Weird vibe...
Hi Carlos,
Learning to apply less is more with phone contact hasn't had the result it seems it should.
To much contact: I come off as needy and girls completely freeze and wont reply to text or voice messages.
To little contact: we dont meet, the vibe dissappears and things dry up.
Out of 17 girls I have had intimate encounters with in the last year NONE of them have called me unsolicited unless we have already had sex.
This is a big picture is...
I realised this is pretty much a mirror image of my social life, period. People simply dont invite me to be in their presence, whether its clubbing, party, coffee, hangout.
Example:
When texting 15 people casual invites to join me watching some free white water kayaking a month ago 6 people replied, no takers. None of them have returned invites since.
What it is that I'm 'putting out' in my overall vibe that's causing this...?
Cheers, Andy
Australia
______________________
CARLOS:
The reality is that in many cases (more in some cultures than in others) women simply WILL NOT help you in the early stages.
Why?
Two big reasons:
1) She knows it's always better for the guy to start the chase.
2) She will only know if you're interested if you're doing the work.
So she just won't help you out, but she won't necessarily shoot you down, either.
The simple fact is that most people don't work too hard to get your friendship if they are already the type of person that would be good for you to have in your life. (i.e., not needy or desperate themselves.) If they're too eager for your friendship, they probably will drive you nuts, really.
Now, it's easy to look at this reaction from people (male or female), and reflect it back on your own value, as if you're not desirable.
If you want to increase your social circulation, recognize that people just won't try too hard. In fact, if you want to keep a guy friend, you'll probably have to work even harder, because most guys are really lazy about their social lives.
It's difficult for me to tell what the "vibe" is without experiencing you first-hand, but I'll guess that this frustration and eagerness is coming through in your attitude.
Hang back, but continue to persist in inviting people into your world through events and parties and what-not. Friendships (and relationships with women) take a lot of liftoff power, just like a rocket, but once you break the gravity of someone's lackadaisical attitude, you'll find more friends. You're just not proven enough yet.
Work on reducing your tendency to push and be too THERE with people. Relax and have fun with every encounter. People want to be around people who A) Make them feel good about themselves, B) are easy to be around.
Remember, those who are hungry rarely get fed, but those who are already fed get even more...
To learn more about the social strategies that will help you get better social circulation, you should learn better Conversation & Persuasion.
CLICK HERE...
Learning to apply less is more with phone contact hasn't had the result it seems it should.
To much contact: I come off as needy and girls completely freeze and wont reply to text or voice messages.
To little contact: we dont meet, the vibe dissappears and things dry up.
Out of 17 girls I have had intimate encounters with in the last year NONE of them have called me unsolicited unless we have already had sex.
This is a big picture is...
I realised this is pretty much a mirror image of my social life, period. People simply dont invite me to be in their presence, whether its clubbing, party, coffee, hangout.
Example:
When texting 15 people casual invites to join me watching some free white water kayaking a month ago 6 people replied, no takers. None of them have returned invites since.
What it is that I'm 'putting out' in my overall vibe that's causing this...?
Cheers, Andy
Australia
______________________
CARLOS:
The reality is that in many cases (more in some cultures than in others) women simply WILL NOT help you in the early stages.
Why?
Two big reasons:
1) She knows it's always better for the guy to start the chase.
2) She will only know if you're interested if you're doing the work.
So she just won't help you out, but she won't necessarily shoot you down, either.
The simple fact is that most people don't work too hard to get your friendship if they are already the type of person that would be good for you to have in your life. (i.e., not needy or desperate themselves.) If they're too eager for your friendship, they probably will drive you nuts, really.
Now, it's easy to look at this reaction from people (male or female), and reflect it back on your own value, as if you're not desirable.
If you want to increase your social circulation, recognize that people just won't try too hard. In fact, if you want to keep a guy friend, you'll probably have to work even harder, because most guys are really lazy about their social lives.
It's difficult for me to tell what the "vibe" is without experiencing you first-hand, but I'll guess that this frustration and eagerness is coming through in your attitude.
Hang back, but continue to persist in inviting people into your world through events and parties and what-not. Friendships (and relationships with women) take a lot of liftoff power, just like a rocket, but once you break the gravity of someone's lackadaisical attitude, you'll find more friends. You're just not proven enough yet.
Work on reducing your tendency to push and be too THERE with people. Relax and have fun with every encounter. People want to be around people who A) Make them feel good about themselves, B) are easy to be around.
Remember, those who are hungry rarely get fed, but those who are already fed get even more...
To learn more about the social strategies that will help you get better social circulation, you should learn better Conversation & Persuasion.
CLICK HERE...
alpha man | how to talk to women | approach women | dating advice for men
posted by Carlos Xuma at 1:56 PM
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ATOM
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