DATING ADVICE FOR MEN - ALPHA MAN QUESTION:

Thank you for these materials. I've been reading and re-reading the Dating Black Book, the Alpha Man and I've just got hold of the Seduction Method.

The Audio really helps to put it all together. After purchasing the ''secrets of the alpha male'' ,and before reading it properly, I interpreted Alpha Male in a kind of caveman way: I had to win every argument in the canteen at work and I walked around like I was the biggest cheese that ever lived.

Until, of course, I read some more and listened to the audio where you specifically advise against doing that.

I'm more relaxed about things now and therefore easier to get on with.

I went speed-dating recently and there the material really helped. Following your emphasis on ''sales'', not being too forward, and the body language you discuss in the audio I developed a tactic for whenever my nerves came on and my face started twitching. I'd do this far away stare just off to the right whoever I was facing like I was thinking about what she said, or just thinking. That, together with leaning back every so often in conversation (and, of course, teasing to please..) worked like a charm.

It was quite freaky to sit there and get on with girls in ways I hadn't been able to before and then just think at the back of my mind -'' buying temperature cooling, must increase buying temperature..'' and then know how to do it.

My question: Im-Balance. Speed dating was good for my confidence but on the street I really struggle. I dig the materials, they're working in a life that up until now was a social desert but...

You talk about periods of neccessary imbalance in life and right now I've got a decent full-time job for the first time in 2 years. It doesn't pay very much but its steady and the people are cool. Financially I have pretty tight margins.

I am, however, developing a creative project in my spare time that a couple of well-placed people have told me should do very well. I believe in it. I figure it'll take me a year to do. Thats my major goal and I've set myself deadlines.

What with that and the sport I do to keep myself sane there just isn't any time or money for going after girls (any time/money I put in could/should be going in to my project).

I feel confident about this (except when my hormones are racing) but I would value your opinion on the issue.

You rightly identify how central women and sex are to the confidence and self esteem of men the world over, but are there periods of imbalance in the lives of alpha men when it is neccesssary/possible to shelve women/dating/seduction for a specified period?

I'm sure I'm not the only one to come across your work just when their lives are about the furthest away from being the ''wing-man academy'' they'd like it to be...

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CARLOS:

Excellent question... I was aiming to cover this in an upcoming newsletter.

Imbalance, as it happens, IS necessary to every man in his life.

There will be times when you must, as Elvis knew, Take Care of Business.

When I first decided that I needed to share this information with guys out there, I went through a long period of intense focus and activity around writing the Dating Black Book, and then creating the web site, and then starting a newsletter...

Sometimes the work seemed overwhelming.

But you know what?

During that time, I was the most attractive to the women in my life.

Why?

Because I was chasing my passions.

I wasn't in a desperate jag of hitting on women.

I was on a road to my goals.

And as a result I came across with the most Alpha of attitudes.

But after a while, all imbalance MUST swing back to balance. We are all like pendulums swinging back and forth. (In more ways than one, if you know what I mean... heheheh...)

The unfortunate thing is that most guys are not swinging all that much. They're too busy trying to stay "safe" and "comfortable." Both of which are illusions.

So there will be periods when you must take care of business for yourself. Remember that your life is the most important thing in the world to you, and NO ONE is going to make it as much a priority as you will. Trust me, only you can make your life what it's going to be.

Some guys go through their whole lives lost because mommy isn't around to do everything for them. And they settle into their widening butt pit in the middle of their couch cushions, glued to watching other people's lives on the television screen.

Live is too short to live someone else's life.

Do your projects and your passions, because that's what makes you a man. (Refer to pages 216-219 in the Alpha e-book...)

But at the same time, ABF!

Always Be Flirting!

You must always be playing around with the sexual energy of women, even women you wouldn't dream of mounting in the sack. Women will love you for it, and you'll keep those skills from growing too rusty while you're otherwise occupied.

Because these are skills that must be actively used and practiced, and like anything else, they will grow dull with time if you don't use them.

It's just like going back to the gym after a month off. You'll be hurting after those first few workouts, and that will be discouraging.

But if you keep running up the stairs when you can, and doing a few situps here and there, it won't be nearly as bad when you return.

Oh, and you'll be amazed to find that there are plenty of women who will finance you while you are in your period of going after your goals... Money shouldn't hold you back there...

And if you're reading this and wonder what we've been talking about, go have a look at an Alpha Man.

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