Girls who flake at the last minute...

I got flaked on yesterday one hour and thirty mintues before a date by her brother calling me up on her cell phone and telling me her mom took her "out of town" and she was really sorry she couldn't make it.

The whole thing seemed fishy to me...

So, I did what I thought was the alpha male thing and sent her this email:

...OUCH!

I can honestly say that never happened to me before now. What a way to drop a hint.

But if for some crazy reason that was serious i'd like to know what day next week you'd like to try for it again.

Otherwise I just don't have any room in my life for someone treats me so badly like you just did.

You could of at least told me that yourself... and you could of told me a lot sooner and before I was almost out my door...

Whatever happened to just using the word "no"? :-P


I figure the more I stand my ground the less of a chance she'll flake on me in the future. I want to know if you'd handle this situation any differently...

______________________

CARLOS XUMA ANSWERS:

Well, you might think that she won't flake on you in the future, and you're partially right. She won't flake on you because she very likely won't want to see you again.

You see, any woman that feels that she's going to have to face a negative opinion of herself or negative experience when she deals with you will simply AVOID SEEING YOU.

Think about it - do you make it a point to hang around people that make you feel uncomfortable? Nope.

That's why demanding respect like this rarely works. Hey, if you need to do this to muster up a little SELF-respect, go for it. But don't think it's going to have the result of making a woman more attracted to you just because you 'put her in her place.'

1. Never rely on a woman to follow through if she's never been out with you before. Double up. Smart guys don't gamble on unproven stocks.

2. The excuse was lame. If it was true, she should have called you.

3. Never expect a woman to "say no." She will do whatever makes her feel the best about not having to go out with you if she doesn't want to go out with you. For her, that's flake.

4. Ignore the incident and get on with your life. When you react to flakes, you're telling the world that you don't have much social exposure and experience (EVERYONE gets flaked on, my friend.) And you're also saying that you take things like this WAY too seriously, probably because you have a lack of options in your life.

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