Trust the Force, Luke....

Carlos,

So I have been an intern at this company for the last 2 and a half months and there is this other female intern who is kind of intriguing.

I think she has been with other guys since I’ve been here, she has had parties over at her house and has mysteriously disappeared upstairs with a guy during the party, but now I think she wants to get with me. The thing is I don’t exactly want to get with her, but I think I could suffer through it. I feel like I should wait for someone whom with I have more feelings for, instead.

Suggestions?

-G
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CARLOS ANSWERS:

If you trust your feelings, and you've taken some time to trust your intuition, you should always follow that.

Just beware of fear masquerading as intuition. That's one of the deadly self-deceptions.

I think you might just want her to not be left out.

If you're going to "Suffer through it" then maybe you should consider waiting for someone that you can have a little more connection with.

It's a big myth that guys want to sleep with every woman is perpetuated slightly out of a false understanding of what's going on under the surface. Yes, when we're young, we all want to experience variety in our sexual partners. But when we find someone we CONNECT with, and not just physically, there's a need to maintain that relationship. This is a good thing.

I, personally, have gone through both situations. I've been with a lot of women, and I've also found a few that were worth keeping. However, it took me going through a LOT of women to find those few good ones. So the two skills actually helped. I much prefer finding a QUALITY woman that I can forge a deeper connection to. Remember what I say: "You will always grow more in the context of a long-term relationship than anywhere else."

A relationship is even more important to us when there's a sense of shared respect - HIGH level of respect - that tells us the other person has a strong sense of internal value. Suddenly we find ourselves wanting to KEEP this relationship more than others. We forget about our need for variety all of a sudden.

Now, I'm getting a little deep here, and I intend to explore this completely for an upcoming program on relationships that I'll be releasing in late '07 or early '08. Just realize that there is a natural need to stay monogamous if our psychology overtakes our innate desire for physical satisfaction.

Men need connection more than you realize. In fact, it's actually men who fall in love faster and harder than women.

For now, you should just follow your gut (intelligently, of course) and realize that all you're looking for here is a little bump in the grass. If you don't really want to get with her, don't. It's really pretty simple.

When YOU start making the decision about who you CHOOSE to sleep with, your self-esteem and self-confidence jump by a mile.

I know this flies in the face of the "pickup artist" advice that you find out there. I'm not here to judge, just to advise. And I've got the experience to back it up...

If you want to know more about this new Alpha Man mindset, I suggest you take a look at this: Secrets of the Alpha Man

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