How to Read Women, and How to be an Alpha Without

I have made it about half-way through the Secrets of the Alpha Man program and listen to the CD's while driving to work. I've been using the Alpha Exercises to refocus on what I want and really need to be doing. I'm seeing a huge improvement in my ability to get things done at work and home by prioritizing and goal setting.

A 2 month old project was completed in 4 focused days because I set the goal of 'done in 1 week' and then I filled in the steps to get there, and just did it. Amazing stuff that's really well put together. By getting that project out of the way, I've had time to think about more important things - namely women, which brings me to my question.

When I read your "Rules for Women", I realized I'd been using the same rules for women as my other activities like work and volunteering. Many of us are passionate about what we do or who we are with - and it becomes part of how we explain who we are. When you decide to leave a situation to protect your priciples, and you find yourself 'between passions' or in that 'dry spell' - how do you explain that to people from a point of power, rather than sounding like you ran away?

For example - if you were a martial arts teacher and discovered the owner was afraid you were going to steal his students - so he lied to you to protect his business - or disrepected you by bouncing you around so the students couldn't find you, or you got passed over for a promotion so they could hire a buddy instead... there's usually a gap between leaving and starting over.

Same is true with women. If more than one of these happens at once, it leaves a big gap that may take a while to recover. As soon as you say, "Well, I was doing this because I enjoyed it... and I left." They always ask, "Why did you leave? What are you doing now?"

Even when confidently stating "I left to pursue other options." some women reply, "I don't believe you. It's inconsistent to leave something you say you loved."

Thanks for all the hard work. I can feel the positive changes starting.

DS in Arizona
______________________
CARLOS:

Great observation here.

When they say: "I don't believe you. It's inconsistent to leave something you say you loved."

It's because women often don't have the Alpha Man self-control to be able to walk away. Their emotions rule their decisions.

Not us. We Alpha Men must rule our emotions.

By the way, you never need to explain yourself to others. Feeling obligated to "explain yourself" shows that you're more concerned about their opinion than your own judgment.

BUT, if you want to give them a reason, you tell them the truth.

"I had to move on to do what was right for me. I'm sure you understand that."

If she says she doesn't believe you, you shrug and walk away.

Act on PRINCIPLE, not for manipulated results. We don't need her opinion.

Opinions are like butt-holes. Everyone's got one.

And they usually stink.

(By the way, he wrote back about his experience with another woman:)

After I sent you the question, I remembered calling one of the (~5) women
on her body language... she was lying about it being inconsistent and couldn't look
at me when she said it. Her body language said she was the one who couldn't
handle it...

I was frustrated with her being the fifth in a row to walk away and
without thinking, I said something like, "That's not true... you're protecting yourself
by walking away now from someone you know will walk if you lie to them, aren't
you?" She kind of slumped her shoulders and said, "Yes." She then looked at
me and asked, "You really are alpha, aren't you?" I just shrugged and she
said, "Too alpha for me." and we each went different ways.


CARLOS: What you said was RIGHT ON. You called her on her bullshit in the right way. And she basically admitted to you that she was low self-esteem and not up to the task of being a woman in your life.

I would be saying a quiet thanks to the cosmos that I eliminated her now rather than months down the road when her flagging sense of self-confidence pulled both of us down a black hole of despair.

The single most important choice you will ever make is what woman will be your companion.

Don't mess it up!

You can find out more about how to meet women here...

alpha man | how to talk to women | approach women | dating advice for men