SAD STORY OF BREAKUP AND NOT GETTING "IT"

Dear Carlos,

I just got the Secrets of the Alpha Man E-Book, and am waiting for the Cds to arrive in the mail. I´ve only read about 100 pages, and you have no idea how much it has changed me. I like the language you use, its straight to the point without any fancy words that I can't even pronounce.

The part [about] the only way you should give up is what has me asking you these questions, that if you screwed up and want the girl back, its better if you just walk away! I like the A.M.P. it up!!

... In conclusion I feel sorry for myself for not reading this book years ago, but you cant cry over spilled milk, so I am taking inmmediate actions now and the book is really helping.

I started going out with this girl and before reading the book I was already acting like an ALPHA Male, I was doing everything just as you describe it, I was so secure about myself that she even mentioned it, I even acted like a true player and she loved it! I was doing everything perfect as I always start out with girls.

But then, I let my guard down and let my feelings come in action, and after this it was down fall. I dated the girl for two months, the first she was still in my country and the second she left for college in another country. Two weeks after she left I took time of work and went to visit her, We never fought or anything while I was around, but there were too many moments of complete silence, and this irritated me so much that I started bugging her if something was wrong. ***

She said that I shouldnt be doubting that everything was good. I knew something was wrong. I came back to my country and things were not the same anymore, before she used to call me 24 / 7 , send me text messages and all that crap, but then I sensed she lost interest and started getting more and more irritated until I told her what the hell is wrong and that I thought we could not keep on with the relationship because she had changed so much. (I was expecting a "lets keep on trying")

eehh!! Wrong answer, she took my offer and we broke up. We havent talked much, the only times weve spoken is when I can't control my emotions and call her, It just bugs me so much that she can be so cold and days can pass by and not call!

I later found out that this girl does not like a guy that gives her to much attention or is a serious type, the way I was with her when I visited, but in reality I am a fun guy to be with, Ive never had trouble girls liking me, but I screwed up with this girl, and the guy she met two months ago, the secure guy, player who took his room the first night they saw each other, did not come out when I visited her.

The guy that visited her was not only trying to get her to bed, I my nice guy came out too much, How can I control my nice guy, the guy that everybody loves and speaks highly of him but that made me loose this girl. How can I block my feelings to jump in and maintain the player that approached her at a bar and told her, you will spend all night by side, and she accepted because she loved the security. Why does alcohol makes me more secure?? I am so secure when I am a bit buzz!!

The question:

WHAT THE HELL DO I DO?? I want her back, but as I read in your book, calling her and keeping her in my life is not the option, but I want you to analyze my situation and give some advice.

Should I want her back after she said that I treated her to nice and gave her too much attention? Is my ego playing a role here saying that I hate losing? How do I control myself from sending her greeting cards etc.? I wont see here till december but we chat every now and then, this question is very important, what do I tell her when we chat, should I answer if she messages me?

Thanks in advance

- Enrique
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CARLOS:

You'll notice that I marked a section above with ***

This was the turning point. This is where so many guys futz it up with their insecurities, and women pick right up on it.


As for "How do you control yourself..."

Dude! That's like asking me how you NOT pick your nose.

YOU JUST DON'T DO IT!

Self-control is the hallmark of the Alpha Man. In order to be one, you must behave like one.

If you're saying that you "can't stop yourself" or anything like that, you're copping out. You're always in control of your actions. You're just making choices based on fear and insecurity as opposed to confidence and calm.

And everyone has more courage with some alcohol in them. There is no "why." That's the effect of a good buzz. It lowers your inhibitions. Beware that demon.

Now, hold on to yourself here, because you might not like the message I'm about to give you, but it's critical that you listen to me.

GIVE HER UP!


Right now.

You lost this woman a long time ago. If you continue down this path, you'll end up at the bar every night crying about this wonderful woman that you let slip out of your fingers.

You'll become so sad that your friends won't even want to be around you.

1) She isn't that special. EVERYONE is special and unique. And that's why we're all the same.

2) You'll lose your confidence and self-respect if you continue this line of thinking and action.

3) The only reason you want this one back so badly is because you messed it up, and now you want to redeem yourself. You're locked into thinking that you can make things right. You can only do this by learning how to move on with your life.

4) You can get a new girlfriend that you can do everything RIGHT with for about 1/10th the energy necessary to "win her back." And even if you do get her back, she'd be watching you every day, testing you to see that you can maintain your new confidence.

But she'll know in her heart that it won't change for her.

What do you do?

You asked me, so I'm telling you - Let her go.

You already read my advice once and you're refusing to follow it.

What will you do this time?

I trust you'll make the right decision.

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