DATING ADVICE QUESTION - HOW TO HANDLE THE BULLY:

I watched an episode of "Blind Date" where a girl was out with a pretty wimpy acting guy. During dinner, some random guy approaches their table, insults the dudes' shirt, and basically hits on the girl. The dude didn't do anything at all, just sat there looking like a schmuck. You could tell his date was disgusted with him.

Now that was pretty disrespectful, hitting on the girl that you are OUT ON A DATE WITH and insulting you while you are on a date. At the end of the date, the girl didn't want to see him anymore and thought he was wimpy.

How should I handle this if it ever happens to me? It's easy to sit back and watch it happen to someone else and realize how terrible it makes HIM look, but if I was actually thrown in the middle of a situation like this, which is something I'm not really prepared for, I don't really know what the heck I'D do either. It'd obviously be an automatic angry response to beat the guy's ass, but I'm not sure that is the way to go here...

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CARLOS:

I've actually covered this in the past with several newsletters and audio segments.

This guy is doing the standard AMOG routine. "Alpha Male of the Group."

He's trying to out-Alpha this poor punk. (And come on, you know this was a setup for television, right?)

First of all, the "beat his ass" response is definitely lame. When you actually grow up, you realize that this leads to possible lawsuits, and possibly getting your own butt tossed in the dirt - or possibly worse.

The answer to this little dilemma can be summed up with:

"WWBMD?"

What Would Bill Murray Do?

Have you ever seen him in his older roles, like in Stripes, and Ghostbusters, and his previous comedies?

He has this WAY about him when he handles chodes like this. He can disarm with a clever put-down that makes you wonder what he's doing, until he's already laughing at you.

Ask women what they think of Bill Murray. They love him. Because he knows how to hold his own. And he's not even very good looking...

He doesn't get angry unless it's an obvious tactic to further his knocking you back down.

Check out how he handles the guy who shut off their "grid" in the Mayor's office in Ghostbusters. Or even how he handles being around 3 gorgeous women in "Charlie's Angels." He's just got this aura of "cool" about him.

Here's what I see Bill doing in this situation:

"Dude! How the heck are you!" Getting up from the table to shake his hand. When the guy offers his hand (or if he doesn't), Bill grabs him and hugs him. "It's been what, 10 years! You look good! How's that little guy of yours doing?" (Either pretending the guy has a kid, OR pointing to the guy's crotch, but doesn't wait for a response. "Oh, hey, that's nice of you to come over here and greet my lady like this, but she's so tired after the autograph signing party, and we're just trying to get a little food in our tum-tums. BARTENDER! Give my friend here a drink! Dirk? Is that your name? Give Dirk here a drink on me!" And he turns the guy towards the bar. "It was great seeing you. And you can get this shirt at ANY Target, my man! It would be tough on your budget, I know, but you could wait for a sale." Gives a cheesy smile and laugh. Turns to his date and winks with a real smile.

Did you get that?

He didn't care about this other punk's universe. He wasn't wallowing in self-pity over getting "picked on."

He took a cocky and disarming sense of humor approach to things.

He didn't sulk or concern himself with how disrespectful this guy was. He just turned the situation around and had some fun with it.

No woman wants a man who can't stand up for himself. It's pitiful.

That woman was right for not wanting to see him again. He had no balls. Can you imagine him in bed, asking permission to do everything, or sulking when she makes some comment about slowing down?

I don't feel sorry for the guy, honestly. I only hope he learns from what happened.

First of all, he should have my Alpha Man Program. It would never have gone this bad if he did. The honest truth is that she was already making up her mind in this direction before this incident probably, and this was the finishing touch.

Second, yeah, I'm sure he's a "nice guy" and there are a million women out there going "Awwwwww!" But no matter what they say, they aren't attracted to him either. He'd just be the recipient of pity.

An Alpha Man stands up for what he wants in life. This woman made the right decision because she knew he wouldn't have the stones to protect her when it came down to it. Even if he had gotten up and tried picking a fight over her, that would have been 1000% better than sitting in silence.

For those of you guys out there who want to know how that whole "cocky & funny" thing works, this is the best way to learn - from the master himself - Bill Murray.

A perfect example of how a cocky, weird looking guy attracts hot women. And not just in the movies.

Yeah, Bill's an Alpha.

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