When you can't keep your game consistent...
hey whats up Carlos, it's Jason, a long-time reader/fan. I've been studying your scriptures and DVDs and must say I am most definitely impressed. Trust me when I say, "You are the dating guru."
But anyways, I just need your advice on one thing. I find my level of confidence isn't staying linear in the sense that it is always fluctuating. I know you stated that at times I will feel "on" and it is common for it to fluctuate. I find it impossible for myself to stay in the battle field with my confidence being low at times.
For example, yesterday I walked past this girl that I want to talk to so badly. I talked to her the other day with out a sweat but yesterday as soon as I walked past her I felt like walking past my enemy, multiple knives thrusting into my heart.
How can I overcome this stopper and how can I keep my confidence high most of the times. I want to naturally feel "on" as much as possible.
______________________
CARLOS XUMA ANSWERS:
This issue of "confidence" is at the core of most guy's game, and almost 100% of the time with women.
EXCEPT those women they aren't attracted to.
Funny how that works, huh?
Your confidence level will always reflect your self-image in the situation that you're in.
If you are driving to the store to pick up some eggs and milk, I'll bet your confidence is high. You've done this before, it's not that challenging, and there are few risks. (Perceived risks, to be precise.)
If you were put into a life-or-death struggle with your evil nemesis, I'll bet your confidence would be shaky at best. You've never done this before, it's challenging, and there are a LOT of risks.
Now translate this over to talking to a woman. All of these mental limitations that seem to appear are a result of your thinking.
Nothing but your THINKING.
You are generating multiple mental problems for yourself by creating a kind of overload. She's not better than you, dude. You just want to THINK she is for some reason, right?
You'll never be "on" all the time. But with practice, you can be "on" a good portion of the time.
I'd say I'm "on" about 85 to 90% in most situations. There are still a few things that throw me.
What you must do is start building your mental images of yourself that affirm this confidence. Right now you're just focusing on the one area you're not feeling confident in and letting it rattle your cage.
Drop the "enemy" imagery.
Drop the "battlefield" visualization.
You see, even you vocabulary is affirming your sense of combative stress you feel.
What if this wasn't your enemy, but possibly the biggest ally you could have in your life? What if she's your new best friend?
What if this isn't so much a battlefield but a friendly sanctuary where you are free to explore and discover new people that can be a part of your life?
Basic NLP stuff. Change your words, and you change your experience.
Learn more about NLP and the power of persuasive conversation (inside AND out) HERE.
But anyways, I just need your advice on one thing. I find my level of confidence isn't staying linear in the sense that it is always fluctuating. I know you stated that at times I will feel "on" and it is common for it to fluctuate. I find it impossible for myself to stay in the battle field with my confidence being low at times.
For example, yesterday I walked past this girl that I want to talk to so badly. I talked to her the other day with out a sweat but yesterday as soon as I walked past her I felt like walking past my enemy, multiple knives thrusting into my heart.
How can I overcome this stopper and how can I keep my confidence high most of the times. I want to naturally feel "on" as much as possible.
______________________
CARLOS XUMA ANSWERS:
This issue of "confidence" is at the core of most guy's game, and almost 100% of the time with women.
EXCEPT those women they aren't attracted to.
Funny how that works, huh?
Your confidence level will always reflect your self-image in the situation that you're in.
If you are driving to the store to pick up some eggs and milk, I'll bet your confidence is high. You've done this before, it's not that challenging, and there are few risks. (Perceived risks, to be precise.)
If you were put into a life-or-death struggle with your evil nemesis, I'll bet your confidence would be shaky at best. You've never done this before, it's challenging, and there are a LOT of risks.
Now translate this over to talking to a woman. All of these mental limitations that seem to appear are a result of your thinking.
Nothing but your THINKING.
You are generating multiple mental problems for yourself by creating a kind of overload. She's not better than you, dude. You just want to THINK she is for some reason, right?
You'll never be "on" all the time. But with practice, you can be "on" a good portion of the time.
I'd say I'm "on" about 85 to 90% in most situations. There are still a few things that throw me.
What you must do is start building your mental images of yourself that affirm this confidence. Right now you're just focusing on the one area you're not feeling confident in and letting it rattle your cage.
Drop the "enemy" imagery.
Drop the "battlefield" visualization.
You see, even you vocabulary is affirming your sense of combative stress you feel.
What if this wasn't your enemy, but possibly the biggest ally you could have in your life? What if she's your new best friend?
What if this isn't so much a battlefield but a friendly sanctuary where you are free to explore and discover new people that can be a part of your life?
Basic NLP stuff. Change your words, and you change your experience.
Learn more about NLP and the power of persuasive conversation (inside AND out) HERE.
alpha man | how to talk to women | approach women | dating advice for men
posted by Carlos Xuma at 1:28 PM 
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