A Startling Fact About How To Get a Girlfriend...

HOW TO ASK A GIRL OUT ON A DATE

This question has to be one I hear most frequently from guys: "How do I ask a girl out on a date?"

The more general form of the question is usually, "Carlos, how do I get a girlfriend?"

But I know that they're secretly asking me "How do I get up the courage to ask a girl out?"

Why is it so difficult for so many guys to ask a girl out on a date?

Asking a woman out on a date is the most intimidating question a guy can ask a woman. It feels like you're putting your head up on the chopping block, giving yourself up for a woman's approval (or rejection.)

And then you wait for the axe to fall.

The answer to the big question "How to get a girlfriend" is deceptively simple. In fact, you'll probably shake your head when you hear it.

The answer is this:

STOP asking women out!

At least the way you have been up until now. Here are the reasons why:

First of all, when you ask a woman out, you're starting a program in a woman's head that says:

"He's romantically interested in me. That means dates, and awkward kisses, and possibly sex, and then a breakup like the last one. He'll add confusion and chaos to my life... I better not."

If you're thinking "Wow, that's a lot of interpretation from one thing!" - well, you're right. But a woman doesn't think this in WORDS, she thinks it in feelings.

We are all programmed with a chain of emotions in us, and we start to short-cut our way to an expected conclusion, even if it makes no logical sense at all.

Have you ever seen an attractive woman across the room and thought this:

"Hmm. She's hot. I'd love to go ask her out on a date. But I have to go over and say something to her. What do I say to her to impress her? I don't have any clever pickup lines. Plus, she's with her friends, laughing and having a good time. She'd probably be turned off or angry if I interrupted her. She's probably not even my type. Hmmm. I think I'll wait and go talk to another woman who's easier to approach."

Ever thought that? Oh, I know you have, because I used to do this to myself all the damn time. I'd self-sabotage my every attempt to approach women.

So don't tell me that these little illogical emotional chains don't happen. They do.

I've seen them at work in seminars and bootcamps I've led, and most of the time the guys don't even realize how quick they're going from the start of that chain to the end. It happens in a split second, and you don't even realize it until you've talked yourself out of trying yet again.

The second reason you don't want to ask a woman out is this: By asking her out on a date, you force her to have to figure out if she's attracted to you right then - at the moment you ask her out. She is required to figure out her interest level in YOU in just 30 seconds of knowing you.

It's like a car salesman whipping out a contract the second you walked on the lot. There still needs to be some interest here before she's going to take a risk with you. (File this under: "NOT How to Get a Girlfriend."

I see and hear this all the time: Guys who just pull up next to a woman and ask her for her number right there, or they'll ask her for a date at the red light.

Hey, he's got balls, but no brains to back it up.

You need to demonstrate some value before a woman will take a chance and make an investment.

You see, a woman doesn't want to lead a man on, but she also rarely knows right away if there's romantic interest. So she might say yes just to not hurt your feelings, knowing she can just ignore your call or flake later.

If you push her for an answer right away (which is how asking her out right then comes across to her) she'll probably say No - even if she's just not sure yet. You're forcing her hand rather than keeping her in the game.

Most women are NOT attracted to you immediately unless it's by your looks alone. If you rely on pure sex appeal to win you the one you want, you'll be relying on "luck." There's a much better way.

Don't move so fast on her. Be patient.

Take a second and think about which of these options might be most attractive to a woman:

A) A meal and/or movie date that shows no originality. A date that implies that she'll have to think about you romantically, and that there will be pressure for her to be "on her best behavior." And then, at the end, she'll have to deal with your awkward attempt to kiss her. (Yikes.)

B) A chance to go out and have some fun, with no pressure.

Which one sounds better to you?

(Now, if you're still leaning towards Option A, think again about which one sounds better to HER...)

Does Option B sound better?

You bet your Playstation it does.

Now, it may not seem to have your interests in mind right away, but that's not what winning a girl's heart is about. It's about forgetting what YOU want long enough that she can believe you will give her what SHE wants.

Let me say that again, with a cooler font: It's about forgetting what YOU want long enough that she will believe you can give her what SHE wants.

There's a saying:

"You can have anything you want in this world if you just help enough other people get what they want."

Also, Option B gives her a little MYSTERY about your intentions and your interest, and that is what a woman wants. Remember the Universal Attraction Formula:

Hope + doubt = passion.

Now, don't misunderstand me to say that you should be trying to ask women out on the pretense of "friendship," or that sneaky and low-risk method guys use. You know, when you "See if she wants to 'hang out' sometime..."

Hang out? What is this, high school?

No, you need to show that you are a sexual man with confidence. You have to show you have posture and that you're not running around begging women to go out with you.

So I know you're wondering, "Carlos, how the hell do you ask a woman for a date, without asking her out, but still show you're interested in her sexually?"

Easy. If you've only just met her on the street, you should see if she's "got a quick minute for coffee or tea at the local coffee shop."

Take the opportunity to build a little rapport and show her that you're FUN. The rest will come later if you can demonstrate a laid-back, fun personality.

Give her a LOW INVESTMENT OPTION.

This is what they call getting the "little Yes's" in sales. You start with something small that she can't perceive as a threat or risk, and once you have her hooked, you start to escalate.

If she doesn't have the time right at that moment, you then shift into a lower gear and get her phone number and/or email address. After you put such a nice request out there for coffee and she turned you down, she's more likely to agree to give you her contact information, and in most cases she will write it right down for you.

If she hesitates, which is very likely because you're still essentially a stranger, then you need to reassure her by teasing her.

That's right - teasing her.

HER: "Sorry, I don't give out my number."

YOU: "It's okay, I'm already stalking a couple other women, so I don't have time for another one. But you could get on my waiting list. C'mon, write it down, you goober."

Make her feel a little silly that she doubts your integrity and character. (You do have good integrity and character, don't you?) Teasing is simply a psychological technique to make her forget about her weird trust issues.

Hand her a pen and paper and don't look her in the eye; just wait. As they say in sales, the next person who speaks, loses.

Usually, she'll write it down. You have to be willing to wait out that long, uncomfortable silence while she figures out if you're a confident guy or a wimp. If you start talking and trying to reassure her of all the reasons she should be okay about giving you her information, you lose.

Just be convinced that anything but giving you her info would be crazy, and she will do exactly what you want.

Once you have her contact information, you only need to get hold of her and invite her to complete the offer you originally made - tea or coffee at a certain local shop. It's a low-investment, and it's not too pushy or overtly "romantic" that she has to worry about where things will go.

(DATING ADVICE TIP: Women are always wondering what things mean, and where things are going...)

At this point, you'd need to start applying my more advanced strategies from The Dating Black Book to keep her interest and get her into you.

You'd use my Tease-to-Please tactic, along with the conversational techniques I detail in my e-book. You could then apply some of the kino tools and other advanced strategies to melt her into your arms.

If you want the COMPLETE game-plan, you have to download my rulebook - THE DATING BLACK BOOK. That's where I've put hundreds of strategies and pointers to this game of seduction so that you can understand how to get a girlfriend - the RIGHT way.

It's not about "How do I get a date?" It's about "How do I get a date with a woman worthy of me?"

There's a big paradigm shift in belief right there, and that's what I want to show you.

It's the difference between having a few pieces of the puzzle, and having the whole work put together for you to give you the BIG picture.

Forgive my vulgarity here when I tell you that it's the difference between hesitation ... and masturbation.

No more fluffy nonsense about telling a woman your "real feelings." You need real tactics and strategies, as well as the underlying beliefs of the men who get dates with the most beautiful women.

Isn't that what you want?

The strategies and information in The Dating Black Book aren't untested theories or lame ideas about how to get a girlfriend... These strategies work for real because I've used them for years to get massive success with women.

Look, I'm skinny, I've got a big nose, and don't have an MBA. That's how I know that my strategies will work for you.

Now, you need to find out...

Go download your copy of The Dating Black Book right now HERE:
The Dating Black Book - Dating Advice for Men.