The TRUTH About Dating and Attraction...

Wednesday, 7:55 AM: Carlos Xuma's Desk...

APPROACHING WOMEN QUESTION:

Let me start off by saying you have been very helpful to me especially since I have [little] experience in the single world. Since the age of of 17 (I'm 23 now) I have been with the same girl.

Now I have been single for 4 months and have been making attempts to meet/date some new women. Your material has been fantastic and I fully understand all your concepts and have been able to apply them once I get past my biggest weakness, Initiation. I feel very awkward and uncomfortable with the approach, I know Practice, practice, practice. I am trying.

The situation is I'm at a bar (party/pickup bar) I make eye conctact with a very attractive fem. I hold eye contact she smiles I smile back and I counted 3 seconds and turned tail instead of approach. It really pissed me off that this happened that I chickened out but oh well life goes on and in time I will learn. But after a few beers I confessed my cowardness to my friends and they asked me to point out the girl. One of them had a master plan of tricking me into going towards her to get a free drink with him,

Once there he turned to her and said this is my friend S hes been digging you all night. I took the opportunity of embarrasment and tried to turn it into something positive. I quickly made a remark about my freinds boldness and finally did what I should have done a while ago and introduce myself.

We had some so-so fluff talk and did some dancing my read on her was a shy girl or a girl to nice to reject me because of this I was not gonna make a play on getting her home that night so I didnt want to seem clingy or aggresive, so after dancing and a little bit more small talk I closed with her number. I Followed all your tips and concepts to the T with the exception of that terrible opening.

*** To much of my great surprise Somehow she is genuinely interested in seeing and getting to know me even with my very weak opening, For the advice and tips I was able to apply that night I got the most attractive girls number I have ever gotten in my life, I still need alot of work on my inner game as you would say, but I guess I didnt do that bad. ***

Any tips would be immensely appreciated. Keep up the good work, I do plan on being more than a podcast free-loader soon. I would really love to join your message forum comunity so I will find something to purchase within the week.

Thanks S.B.

CARLOS:

Thanks for your letter... And I'm glad I've been able to help.

I'm not sure I found a question in your letter, but I will comment.

You don't have to do EVERYTHING right to get a woman interested.
You just have to do ENOUGH things right.

This is a big change in thinking, because you shouldn't put too much pressure on yourself to succeed. Just KEEP PLAYING.

You did the right thing by not trying to push things all the way to the bedroom. Have patience. That's a far better approach. I encourage quality relationships wherever possible.

And don't beat yourself up over what you didn't do; congratulate yourself on what you DID do. I highlighted the portion of your email to emphasize the important lesson to pull from the experience. (***)

Sometimes we succeed in spite of ourselves.

Maybe you should take that experience, and anytime you feel that you need motivation, remember what happened. Be your own best friend and introduce this valuable commodity (YOU) to other women.

Yes, the Podcast is only the tip of the iceberg. If you want more success in the approach and meeting women, I highly suggest you look at this program:

/talk-to-women-approachwomen.htm

You'll get the most out of this, and probably the Alpha Man program for more confidence.

KEEP YOUR TONGUE UNDER CONTROL:

hey Carlos, "the great" I have a problem, for some reason when I am talking to people my words jumle up and then come out in a way nobody understand what I was saying or talking about. I even find it extremely hard to explain thing to people clearly.

I know what I want to say but it the right words just wont come to mind for me spit out. sometimes its like I want to say two different thoughts at the same time and end releasing some bullshit. even when talking to girls. Is there a way to take care of this problem?

-S

CONTINUED...

CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE...

CARLOS:

Okay, you guys are taking this "Carlos the great" thing too far... I was joking with the last one... :)

But feel free to stroke my ego with a compliment every so often. Couldn't hurt.

Dude, this is one I totally hear you on. I still think faster than my mouth, and it gets me a little jumbled from time to time.

When I'm instructing a class, I have to make sure I'm easing back on the mouth-throttle a bit or my words don't come out the right way.

The best exercise for this is consciously inserting pauses into your speech. Hurrying your speech up is a sign of insecurity because it's viewed as someone who thinks they have to speak fast enough to not lose the other person's attention.

Another exercise is to SLOW THE &*$# DOWN! Just consciously take control of your speech and keep your talking behind the speed of your thinking. You'll do much better.

I suggest you also take a class in public speaking. I learned my speaking ability the hard way, through trial-and-error, but it helped to get some coaching. Try Toastmasters.

Okay, one more shameless plug:

I cover at least a dozen exercises in the Approach Women NOW program that will help you immensely with this. Everything from getting your voice and mouth ready to speak, to what to talk about and how to deliver it.

Check it out here:
/talk-to-women-approachwomen.htm

ALPHA MAN COVERS HIS YOU-KNOW-WHAT:

There is this girl who lives below me in my dorm. When she is sober, she is the sweetest girl ever to me, but when she is drunk something is wrong with her. She ALWAYS hits me...and hits me hard, like in my stomach and my face. Last night, she hit me twice in my eye and tried to spit on me. I've never done anything to her!!!

Last time this happened, she apologized the next morning and claimed not to remember. I mean, she gets absolutely wasted everytime, but is only mean to me when she's drunk. I prevented her from hitting me last night a couple times, firmly, but she complained to my roommate I was hurting her. I was hurting HER?!?!?!?!

Give me a break! What am I supposed to do? I'm going to go talk to her later on today, but what should I say? This can't go on, especially when I have done nothing to her.

CARLOS:

Here's how I'd handle this one:

1) Talk to her again. Let her know that this behavior is completely unacceptable. If she continues, she's going to find herself in some deep $h!t.

2) Report her to your RA. Also, file a report or some kind of information and GET IT ON RECORD. If this girl decides to go formal and complain against YOU, you could find yourself looking for a new school, or even grabbing your ankles each morning so your cell mate can tickle his pleasure with the "new kid" fresh out of college.

Don't be dumb. Your situation really doesn't matter to others. Women are going to be believed more often than a guy when it comes to these things. Our society is predisposed to believe that men are rapists and killers, and that it's part of your violent nature that made you do what you didn't do.

(I don't agree with this viewpoint, but it's what the media perpetuates.)

3) Line up your witnesses. Make sure you've got a few people who are willing to support you and your story if she goes psycho. You need PROOF, when it comes right down to it.

4) Stay away from this girl. Never be alone with her anymore.

EVER.

That last one should be a no-brainer, but chicks make guys do some incredibly stupid things sometimes.

I don't care how "sweet" she is. I'm sure the poisoned kool-aid those cult members of Jim Jones drank was plenty sweet going down.

Mmmm. Yum. Sugar-coated psychopathic chick.

And in case you feel like this goes against being an Alpha Man because you're tattling on a girl, guess again. You're NOT an Alpha if you're not thinking with your brain.

Keep in mind that if, in one of these drunken confrontations, you ever hit her back, you'll find yourself in the Hurt Locker for a loooooooong time.

She's got an obvious drinking problem, and she's got some subconscious violent tendencies. She's also an instigator, and she'll leave trouble in her wake.

Let her spiral the drain. Just don't get caught in the undertow.

Start being choosier. There are millions of women out there looking for a guy and aren't abusive or putting up a psycho front. Find them...

You want some opportunity to meet the woman you REALLY want instead of settling for someone else's leftovers?

Perhaps you'd like to know the mindset of the men that take no crap from any man, woman, child, or small furry mammal.

First of all, you need my e-book - The Dating Black Book. I've packed this e-book with HUNDREDS of examples, tips, strategies, explanations, what to say, what to do, how to interpret situations, and how to clean up that stinkin' thinkin' ...

Don't ignore that little voice inside you right now that's telling you to take action. It's the one part of you that you can trust. Most guys will let their egos stop them from learning the things they need to, and they'll live in regret later on for it.

I meet these guys all the time, and they only have one person holding them back from success - themselves.

All the good stuff is inside the Dating Black Book. And you can get it here:

https://www.datingdynamics.com

Go check out the new site look.

Oh, and I've got an e-book and 6-CD audio program you'll want to have a look at, too. This program covers every part of your self-confidence and INNER game.

I cover ALL aspects of overcoming your shyness, fears, and insecurities with women (and with life) and get you on the path to TOTAL self-confidence.

You can see this life-changing program here:

http://www.alphaseduction.com

Listen to what this guy has to say about it, and how he's learned from the program:

"The negative self-talk was killing me for decades, that's my motivation for doing this. No woman is going to give me s*x out of pity. s*x is just a mindless fat-burning exercise like climbing the StairMaster; it's the skill I want so I won't become co-dependent. Being desired is the prize I'm looking for, and I need to accept myself first.

"I had a very attractive woman 6 years ago who was even needier than me... like a small child hanging off my arm... it mirrored my own insecurities and made me very uncomfortable. That's how I made other women feel and they left or never felt attraction, not because they were confirming my cooked-up negative fantasies I thought was their impression of me.

"As for my past, WHO CARES!!!!! Those are the two most relieving words I have ever adopted.

"Glad to be in your bootcamp.. - C.H."

There are more testimonials at the bottom of this email for you to read...

This new e-book and audio will guide you through exercises, tips, and strategies for changing your life RIGHT NOW. It's not just about getting more women (even though that's a really great side-effect of this program), but we show you the way to a more successful LIFE - business, family, social, financial... everything!

I've even thrown in a few extra bonuses that you're going to want to grab with this offer, too. I've spent the last year creating this great program, including the best of our Advanced Audio Coaching Sessions, with 34 all new tracks specifically aimed at this topic, and HUNDREDS of pages of new advice on how to get your game together with women.

You can see the complete list of contents here at:
http://www.alphaseduction.com

If you get the program right away, I'll send you the 393 page e-book RIGHT AWAY so you can get started... AND I'll even send you a link to join the Alpha Man Forum - a special user group where you can exchange information and tips with other Alpha Men.

Just remember: Every man is self-made, but only the SUCCESSFUL admit it.

I'll be back with more advice soon ...

- Carlos

CONTINUED...

______________________

TESTIMONIALS:

"Dear Carlos, Your program is a "killer..."
It helped me to get rid of many traits of the so called "nice guy"
- shyness, indecisiveness, "ass-kissing", etc.

... It boosted significantly my love and s*x life. Not only [this]
... It helped me to be more successful in doing business, I can now easily spot when somebody wants to "walk over me" and try to make me submissive as usually women do. Thanks a lot! My best wishes to you!"
- S.D.
Sofia, Bulgaria

"I LOVE your Secrets of the Alpha Man program. It is by far the best overall e-book and audio program online that I have read....and I have done my research and read all the popular e-books and what not.

"I already was having a lot of success prior to the program but my success has doubled since reading the e-book and listening to the audio." - D.

"... About your Alpha Man program... It's bad ass. I'm only halfway through the book (200pgs) and halfway through the CD's. It's really phenomenal..." - T. T.

"Carlos, I purchased the Alpha Male program recently and I must say it's the best investment I have ever made in my own personal development. I have had seeds of thought and insight on some of things you talk about in the books and tapes, but now I'm getting a fuller picture of what it takes to be a real man. It's incredible..." - B., Colorado

"Hey Carlos ... Listen, I want to thank you for all of your work in these CDs and e-books. I've only had them for about a week and I've already made some major breakthroughs. You opened my eyes in being an Alpha Male.

"I was recently getting to know this girl... and I was being the "nice guy." Boy! the way you described the steps a man goes through to get to "she's the one for me" is right on target! I was able to step back... put her in her place on the phone and in person--it felt GREAT (so empowering!). I ended up not liking who she is and have moved on since.

"Also, I went to a club the other day... and I usually don't because I don't know how to dance that great--but I did anyway. I applied your exercise where you don't look at the final outcome... you just take the first step... and be an alpha man there.

"Well, I felt powerful and by the end of the night I was leading this girl around the club by her hand (taking charge), ordering two beers and sitting down with her with my arm around her like an alpha man should. She was so into our conversation and I felt like I was totally in charge.

"Oh, and yes... I danced with 5 gorgeous girls that we had dinner with. Damn! it was good.

Carlos... seriously... thanks!"

- 'D' Los Angeles, CA

The secrets of compelling communication and persuasion are easy to learn.

Most guys don't approach women because they haven't got the SKILLS to APPROACH WOMEN. Once you have them, you'll feel less anxious and you'll actually DO IT.

It's time to learn the TRUTH about women ... and attraction.

It's all about your Inner Game...

Discover your inner Alpha Man - NOW

Click HERE to learn more...