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CARLOS XUMA -
DATING ADVICE FOR MEN NEWSLETTER: |
The TRUTH About Dating and Attraction...
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Saturday, 9:45 AM: Carlos Xuma's Desk...
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"First off let me say that I have never had problems with meeting woman, some have considered me to be a player. I am open minded and always willing to learn new things so when I first heard about your audio's I was kinda of iffy about getting or paying for the audio's, but I am glad I did. I am going to be getting your books in a bit, you have some good info and stuff I haven't heard of before and I can't wait to try some of it out. I do have one question how do you find the balance so you won't come across like being to arrogant or stuck up? I really look forward to listening to more of your stuff and I will be using your advice. You have some great knowledge. Keep up the good work." J in San Diego
"Great work on the audio series! That is a fantastic idea ... There is something about hearing the words spoken by the master that adds greatly to the learning experience. Once again, I am IMPRESSED!" Del S.
QUESTION (sort of)
I have read that in order to be attractive a good technique is being ambiguous and contradictory, because that way you evoke a mechanism that will continue an inner research until a satisfactory meaning can be found. And when this meaning is found, it's time for you to behave inconsistently in order to generate other confusion.
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Huh?
(Insert look of complete bafflement here.)
(Now, insert look of semi-understanding as I read between the lines.)
CARLOS:
Look, let's start by getting something straight - there is a lot of technical mumbo jumbo that you can come up with for a lot of the psychological principles of attraction. But the saying still holds true: If you can't explain it in simple terms, you don't understand it well enough.
This came to me, not as a question but as a statement, and I felt it warranted review anyways, because I fear that there may be some guys out there who take too much of this to heart and go a bit too over the top on the analytical side.
Ambiguous and contradictory is a side of attraction that fascinates us. As humans, we are drawn to the unknown. And when we learn what we want to know, we rapidly become bored and move on.
The problem with the way you have stated this strategy is that it sounds as if you rely on baffling her more than anything else.
Confusion is not a valid method by itself. While I do believe that you don't want a woman to be too sure of how you feel about her, generic confusion is going to leave you looking a little bit crazy when all is said and done.
The trick is to keep her unsure of your intentions and unsure of your feelings for her.
CONTINUED...
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CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE...
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Why?
Because when a woman is sure of your feelings for her, she is NOT attracted to you even more, as Hollywood would have you believe. The more sure she is of your feelings, the less MYSTERY you pose to her. And, as a result, the less CHALLENGE you present to her.
That's right: It works against you.
So what do you need to do?
You should focus on the important part of generating attraction - without having to resort to artificial (and weird) behavior.
How?
First, do not try to deliberately confuse a woman. All you need to do is make sure you're not telling her everything about you in one shot.
Women like the notion that there's more to you than meets the eye, and that they haven't got you all figured out. When you're figured out, you're OUT.
One method is to change your mind on a subject or opinion. Let's say she knows you prefer mixed drinks to wine. The next time you're out with her and you're ordering a drink, order wine. She'll complain that you said you liked mixed drinks more, and you can just wink and smile.
(Think about how this affects you when a woman is "fickle." When SHE changes her mind it's a "woman's prerogative." Talk about double standards.)
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The less a woman thinks she has you "figured out" the better off you are.
A woman wants to find out new things about you until the very end of your days with her. When she thinks she's figured you all out, you're ready to be traded in for a new model.
Another way of keeping her a little off balance is to reveal new things about you that seem contradictory to what she may already know.
Let's say you're a very law-abiding, stand-up citizen. You might want to let her know about the barroom brawl you got into, or the time you shoplifted from K-mart. Let her know that you have a side that she hasn't seen before.
I remember when I was seeing a gal who told me that when she was in high school she used to go through the lockers in the gym during class and steal money out of purses. I was completely shocked by this, but on the other hand, it really turned me on to her. Here was this nice girl who had been VERY naughty. It showed me that just when I thought I knew her, I realized I didn't really know her.
It's time for you to generate your own constructive confusion. But don't set out to confuse. Just plan to keep her on her toes. Don't tell her everything about yourself. Make her work to learn some of the juicy parts. Slow disclosure.
Now, there are a lot more things to learn than how to keep her "confused."
Women are getting more and more picky, and to stand out you MUST have the edge on the other guys out there. My e-book gives you the information and skills to get the women YOU want.
There are so many things you have to have down pat in the singles world.
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Like, how do you NOT screw it up in those vital first couple minutes of meeting a woman?
You've heard me say this before: Getting laid is not about getting "lucky."
It's about having the right knowledge and understanding up front. Women are waiting to sleep with you, if you'll just give them the right reasons WHY.
I've worked for years to break down what it is that women are trying to tell you with their behavior, and finding out the hard way why being a "nice guy" is dooming you to failure.
When you have that knowledge and understanding, you can make better choices and demonstrate better behaviors.
When you demonstrate better behavior, you will get better RESULTS.
My e-book -THE DATING BLACK BOOK- will help you get all of that and then some.
Just remember: Every man is self-made, but only the SUCCESSFUL admit it.
Where do you go for the information you need?
THE DATING BLACK BOOK has the complete breakdown of the dating scene, and it's ready for download right now, no matter where you are or what time it is in the world.
/ebookstore.htm
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CONTINUED...
______________________
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And the advanced audio series is also finally ready to help you build on that knowledge and take your success to the extreme. Imagine having a coach giving you tips, strategies, and a complete breakdown on how to improve your technique and success with women - first hand. You can listen to this audio RIGHT NOW on your PC or Mac, and you can even use your MP3 player to take the learning and go mobile.
The monthly audio series is over 80 minutes of advice and explosive tips, and it's available for download at:
/audioprogram.htm
You see, the first 30-60 days of any dating relationship with a woman is THE most volatile, since almost ALL the mistakes are made here. If you last past this point, chances are you'll be able to keep her for as long as you like.
If you've ever found yourself saying, "I don't understand women!" then my e-book and audio coaching will finally give you the knowledge you need to finally understand. It's like getting a book that shows you how a certain magic trick is done that has fascinated you for years. You get to peek behind the scenes and learn how things REALLY work.
I remember when this realization hit me, and how excited I was. I stayed up that night writing out how I'd use the knowledge to improve my dating life. It wasn't until years later that I got around to writing the book on it, but I finally did it. And now you can download all these priceless strategies right now at: /ebookstore.htm
Is there ANYTHING else worth learning more than how to be successful with women?
If there is, you should let me know... because your priorities may be a little whacked.
"Carlos knows exactly what he's doing and reveals all in his Dating Black Book. You can't go wrong when you follow what he teaches. I can tell you that he studies this game like an expert.
He invests both his time and money to provide his subscribers with the best dating tips, resources and information. I already got more than my money's worth from his Dating Black Book and highly recommend it to you."
- David Kwan, DatingClass.com
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The secrets of compelling communication and persuasion are easy to learn.
Most guys don't approach women because they haven't got the SKILLS to APPROACH WOMEN. Once you have them, you'll feel less anxious and you'll actually DO IT.
It's time to learn the TRUTH about women ... and attraction.
It's all about your Inner Game...
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Discover your inner Alpha Man - NOW
Click HERE to learn more...
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Listen to what the other gurus are saying about Carlos' work...
"I've read every book and studied every system on dating. The problem with most 'gurus' in this field is that they're not teaching men how to build a solid foundation. Until you change your internal belief system and adopt an Alpha mindset, all the
tactics and techniques in the world aren't going to do you any good. (Actually, it's like learning just enough karate to get your ass kicked!) Carlos Xuma is the best there is at teaching men how to develop their 'inner game.' From
there, he'll give you the complete set of tools for approaching women, and life, with absolute confidence and skill. If you're in this game to win it, these are the rules you need to learn."
- "Supreme", M.A.C.K. Tactics co-creator
"Carlos Xuma is a man who has a clear passion for imparting the success with women he has experienced to other guys worldwide. He approaches his craft with immense integrity and a distinct style!"
- Scot McKay, X & Y Communications, DeserveWhatYouWant.com
"Carlos Xuma is the REAL DEAL! If you are serious about creating an extraordinary relationship. You will learn more about the needs and desires of women than they do themselves! I highly recommend
Carlos to any man who is ready to get the woman of his dreams. I love his game, its 100% real."
- The Dean, Dating4Men.com
"Carlos Xuma is one of those rare guys in the field who actually GETS what interacting with women is all about. His advice goes beyond the pick-up lines and approach techniques that so many guys use and fail with. Rather, Carlos gives guys everywhere practical,
valuable advice that will make men attractive not just for one night, but for many, many years. He lays down the foundation for becoming a NATURALLY attractive man, full of confidence and the ability to fully ENJOY being around hot babes.
Unlike other pickup artists, Carlos shares information that helps you not only in one area of life, but in many: in social relationships, at work, sports, with personal goals. He'll help make you a well-rounded, self-believing alpha MAN who's capable of just
about anything. And seducing gorgeous, high-quality women, is just the beginning."
- James Brito, How to Be Irresistible to Women
"Carlos Xuma is one of the few men in the 'seduction' or 'attraction' community who digs beneath the surface of passing attraction, and Explores what it is to be a man who attracts women by virtue of his character and, consequently, the natural outward expression of high character.
He brings words like 'discipline' and 'integrity' to the forefront, and waddya know, those are exactly the qualities women truly crave in a man."
- Grant Adams, CEO - net2bed.com
"Hey Carlos, I write about the biology of men and women's behavior. You seem to know the biology of behavior without knowing it. How do you do that? You have a deep intuition of dynamics - it took me 7 years of academic research to discover. And you find sharp ways to apply it practically... Keep up the good work, brother."
- Joe Quirk, Author of "Sperm are from Men, Eggs are from Women"
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