The TRUTH About Dating and Attraction...

Monday, 8:30 PM: Carlos Xuma's Desk...

QUESTION:

My name is Bryan Hill. There are these two women that work in the mall that I am attracted to and would like to get to know. Should I go up to them and start talking to them? If you where attracted to someone would you go up and talk to them?

There was this one women that I saw at the wawa today that I was attacted today but I didn't say anything? Which brings me to the next point can a men or women that are average looking go out with someone who are attractive or very attractive?

What I mean to say is can you date out of your league?
What are some singals that women give to men to let them know that they are attracted to them?
How can you read a women body language to know if they are interested in you?
There is this Saturday night dance party that is held every Saturday night. It is like a club. I have never been to a club. Do you think I should go to see what it is like?

CARLOS:

Another record number of questions packed into one big question. I'll hit the high points...

You know, I went out in the dating world for years and made a complete mess of myself and my dates. Kissing badly. Fumbling to get to first, second, third base ... Not sure how I was suppose to go for home plate. Not sure if I was being too "nice."

I learned the hard way when women would lose their interest in me. And, because I had no confidence that I could repeat my success from the last gal, I'd get stuck in the "better than nothing" (BTN) complex, and I wouldn't cut my losses early enough.

Then, I saw what was going on. It became so clear that women don't want men who just chase around after them like lost puppies. They don't want "Nice Guys" who give them everything they want. (That's the problem! Most every guy gives a woman exactly what she SAYS she wants!)

Then I started to connect the dots and understand just what was happening and why. I saw through the manipulations, the silent-treatments, the games... I finally understood why they wouldn't call, and what it was I was doing (and NOT doing) to get these results.

I have an offer for you that you simply can't refuse.

Get the benefits of THE DATING BLACK BOOK without any risk for the next 90 days.
/ebookstore.htm

CONTINUED...

CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE...

That's right, everybody... You can now download the first, last, and best book you'll ever need on understanding women and dating from Dating Dynamics with no risk at all.

Download the book, read it, review the strategies, and put it to work for you right away. If you don't feel that it's the incredible, insightful, and invaluable tool I've made it out to be, you can simply ask for a refund.

There are dozens of guys out there trying to pull in a fast buck selling you their books on speed seduction and the like. And many of them are decent quality books. (I've read just about all of them ...) But a lot of these "authors" are just out there for the money. I think you guys can tell I'm not. I'm in this for the help I can give you, educating men to do better in their lives in the one thing that has eluded us for thousands of years - SUCCESS WITH WOMEN.

Is there anything more important?

Time is running short for all of us, no matter how young or old you are. Don't waste precious years learning by trial and error (and perhaps not at all).

Get the information on how to improve your dating life TODAY. Make the changes you need to make to get the love, sex, and relationships that you want and DESERVE to have.

You see, the first 30-60 days of any dating relationship with a woman is THE most volatile, since almost ALL the mistakes are made here. If you last past this point, chances are you'll be able to keep her for as long as you like.

It's all in those critical first few dates that you establish the precedent for the rest of the time you're with a woman.

Things like:
- When and how you touch her
- When and how to kiss her
- When, where and how intimacy builds from the early steps.
- How to progress from the early steps all the way through to s*x

If you've ever found yourself saying, "I don't understand women!" then this book will finally give you the knowledge you need to finally understand. I'm telling you, it's like getting a book that describes how a certain magic trick is done that has fascinated you for years. You get to peek behind the scenes and learn how things really work.

I remember when this realization hit me, and how excited I was. I stayed up that night writing out how I'd use the knowledge to improve my dating life. It wasn't until years later that I got around to writing the book on it, but I finally did it. And now you can download all these priceless strategies right now at: /ebookstore.htm

Is there anything else worth learning more than how to be successful with women?

QUESTION:

There are these two women that work in the mall that I am attracted to and would like to get to know. Should I go up to them and start talking to them? If you where attracted to someone would you go up and talk to them? There was this one women that I saw at the wawa today that I was attacted today but I didn't say anything? Which brings me to the next point can a men or women that are average looking go out with someone who are attractive or very attractive? What I mean to say is can you date out of your league? What are some singals that women give to men to let them know that they are attracted to them?

CARLOS:

Another record number of questions packed into one big question. I'll hit the high points...

1) Yes, if you're attracted to them, you must go up and talk to them. Why? Because if you are attracted to them and DON'T approach them, you'll never stand a chance. Like Wayne Gretzky once said: "You miss every shot you don't take."

2) Can you date out of your league?

GREAT question. Let's dig into this one a little.

First of all, there's two sides to this question. "Out of your league" means different things to different people. For some, it's dating someone with a significantly different lifestyle (i.e., actress and pool cleaner.) Or it might be someone with significantly different income levels and socio-economic backgrounds.

(I once dated a gal who came from a lower-class background, but her thinking always kept her intimidated about being with someone of a higher current status.)

The one that you are speaking about is where someone is significantly different in looks. For the sake of this discussion, we'll interpret that to be more than two points on the traditional "10" point scale.

It's been my experience that, all things being equal, we always tend to end up long term with someone within 1 to 2 points of our own level of attractiveness. (Note that I said LONG TERM.) I believe this is due to relative levels of self-esteem and socialization. If you dated someone too much more attractive than you, you'd find that you'd be jealous and insecure all the time that she was going to "trade you up" for someone better looking.

In other words, you will only be able to date someone that your level of self-esteem will allow you to.

If you're insecure and needy, you'll be forced to settle for a woman much lower on the scale. If you are very secure and independent, you can go for the most beautiful women on the planet.

So, again, while women are INITIALLY attracted to looks, you can date a woman that is much better looking, as long as your SELF-CONFIDENCE is high enough to match her level of game-playing (testing) and can keep her challenged enough.

Now, while there are many that would think I'm wrong in thinking that we all find the same type of people attractive, and that there are different tastes, and I do not disagree. I think we do have variations in taste that make one kind of woman more attractive to one person, say, than another.

But honestly, there are a LOT of commonalities about what guys find attractive.

Symmetrical features.
White eyes and teeth.
Large breasts.
Round tush.
Flat stomach.
Eyes and mouth separated by a standard ratio.

Now, there are a lot of guys who are more attracted to certain elements of a woman's physique, but overall we find a lot of standard appearances attractive. It's rare that you hear a guy saying: "Jennifer Garner? Ewww! What a pig!"

There is another standard for selecting a woman, and that is that, over time, the person you're most likely to stay with will be more like you than different. Meaning that if they are of a similar age, interests, income, and education, you're more likely to go the distance.

It's pure common sense that if you have more differences than commonalities, you're going to have more reasons to NOT be together.

(There, I just summarized about 90% of the situations where people break up due to "irreconcilable differences.")

So, "out of your league" depends on what you're talking about. If you mean, can you date a woman more attractive than you? YES. Abso-f*%#ing-lutely. But you have to have the attitude and confidence to match her.

When someone says "out of your league," though, typically they are already coming from a standpoint of inadequacy. They have already classified a woman as "unattainable" because of her appearance. "She could never want me," frustrated chump thinks to himself. And then he goes on in his head to sum up all the reasons why, and even making up a few along the way.

All guys are guilty of this to some degree, and by the same token, we are also guilty of sabotaging ourselves. We can never attract or keep a woman beyond our consistent level of self-image.

As far as knowing when a woman is attracted to you, this is another poor approach, because you're assuming to wait until you find out she's attracted to YOU before you do anything. If you read my e-book and practice the strategies, her attraction is YOUR choice. Don't wait for her to be attracted to you, because that's the passive approach. MAKE her attracted to you.

Again, all guys are guilty of this, too. We wait for there to be some sign before we take action.

CONTINUED...

______________________

I learned the hard way about this when women would lose their interest in me. And, because I had no confidence that I could repeat my success from the last gal, I'd get stuck in the "better than nothing" (BTN) complex, and I wouldn't cut my losses early enough.

Then, I saw what was going on. It became so clear that women don't want men who just chase around after them like lost puppies. They don't want "Nice Guys" who give them everything they want. (That's the problem! Most every guy gives a woman exactly what she SAYS she wants!)

Then I started to connect the dots and understand just what was happening and why. I saw through the manipulations, the silent-treatments, the games... I finally understood why they wouldn't call, and what it was I was doing (and NOT doing) to get these results.

I have an offer for you that you simply can't refuse.

Get the benefits of THE DATING BLACK BOOK without any risk for the next 90 days.
/ebookstore.htm

That's right, everybody... You can now download the first, last, and best book you'll ever need on understanding women and dating from Dating Dynamics with no risk at all.

Download the book, read it, review the strategies, and put it to work for you right away. If you don't feel that it's the incredible, insightful, and invaluable tool I've made it out to be, you can simply ask for a refund.

There are dozens of guys out there trying to pull in a fast buck selling you their books on speed seduction and the like. And many of them are decent quality books. (I've read just about all of them ...) But a lot of these "authors" are just out there for the money. I think you guys can tell I'm not. I'm in this for the help I can give you, educating men to do better in their lives in the one thing that has eluded us for thousands of years - SUCCESS WITH WOMEN.

Is there anything more important?

Time is running short for all of us, no matter how young or old you are. Don't waste precious years learning by trial and error (and perhaps not at all).

Get the information on how to improve your dating life TODAY. Make the changes you need to make to get the love, sex, and relationships that you want and DESERVE to have.

You see, the first 30-60 days of any dating relationship with a woman is THE most volatile, since almost ALL the mistakes are made here. If you last past this point, chances are you'll be able to keep her for as long as you like.

It's all in those critical first few dates that you establish the precedent for the rest of the time you're with a woman.

Things like:
- When and how you touch her
- When and how to kiss her
- When, where and how intimacy builds from the early steps.
- How to progress from the early steps all the way through to s*x

If you've ever found yourself saying, "I don't understand women!" then this book will finally give you the knowledge you need to finally understand. I'm telling you, it's like getting a book that describes how a certain magic trick is done that has fascinated you for years. You get to peek behind the scenes and learn how things really work.

I remember when this realization hit me, and how excited I was. I stayed up that night writing out how I'd use the knowledge to improve my dating life. It wasn't until years later that I got around to writing the book on it, but I finally did it. And now you can download all these priceless strategies right now at: /ebookstore.htm

Is there anything else worth learning more than how to be successful with women?

The secrets of compelling communication and persuasion are easy to learn.

Most guys don't approach women because they haven't got the SKILLS to APPROACH WOMEN. Once you have them, you'll feel less anxious and you'll actually DO IT.

It's time to learn the TRUTH about women ... and attraction.

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Discover your inner Alpha Man - NOW

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