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CARLOS XUMA -
DATING ADVICE FOR MEN NEWSLETTER: |
The TRUTH About Dating and Attraction...
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Saturday, 3:50 AM: Carlos Xuma's Desk...
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QUESTION:
Carlos, �I followed your tactics to the letter "T" and managed to get a few very attractive girls phone numbers from Myspace.Com. �These girls seemed to be blown away by my emails, which are simular to the ones you send. �All 3 girls denied the request to give me there number on my 3rd email, however after a couple more exchanges via email/Chat, they all gave it up. �I always wait a minimum 2 days before I call and NEVER on a weekend.
*First Girl (Taylor)*
I called last week and said hi, I'm Jim from Myspace. �She was like, "Hey". �I asked her what she was doing and she replied, " I'm bowling with my friends". �I figured there was no way I could hold a conversation with her when she was having fun bowling with her friends. ��I said, "ok and that I would call another time."
I called her 3 days later, and got her voice mail, leaving a message that said, Hey Taylor this is Jim, I had a few minutes and thought I'd see whats up. �At any rate I'll call you some other time." �I called a few days later only to her never answering the phone for me, so I left her my last message that said, Taylor this is Jim, either your screening your calls or playing hard to get, thats cute. �I figured I would try you one last time.
NO REPLIES.
*Second Girl (Kaitlyn)*
I �got her number on Friday and decided to call it tonight, late Sunday night. �I called and said,
Jim: Heya Kaitlyn this is Jim from Myspace.
Kaitlyn:"hey"
Jim: Heya Kaitlyn this is Jim from myspace.
Kaitlyn: hey
Jim: What are you doing?
Kaitlyn: Driving to a Graduation party.
Jim: Graduation Party in the middle of July, aren't they usually
held in June.
Kaitlyn: Yea and I have to babysit tomorrow.
Jim: That is going to be miserable for you tomorrow.
Kaitlyn: I can handle the mornings after party.
Jim: laughing....as you get a little older those mornings get rough.
Jim: so what is grotton like I never have heard of it.
Kaitlyn: Its a small boring town
Jim: no Macdonald's???
Kaitlyn: None
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Uncomfortable silence
Jim: we had a block party here this past weekend, It was neat. � They close the road and all the neighbors get together congregating in the road playing beer pong and dancing. �It was alot of fun
Kaitlyn: Cool........Im gonna have to let you go before I lose cell service.
Jim: Ok I'll talk to you later
Total time on the phone 3:13 seconds. �I wasn't at a point to where I could end the conversation.
*Third Girl {Christina} *Now I went at this a little different, I didn't want to ask what they were doing to cut me off so short. �I shot into conversation mode, and failed.
Jim: Is this Christina?
Christina: yes
Jim: This is Jim from Myspace
Christina: oh hey, how are you.
Jim: how was your wedding?
Christina: Good
Jim: Did you get drunk like a bad lil girl
Christina:no my family was there.
Jim: Oh I don't believe they are really that hard on you.
Christina: laughing....oh they are
Jim: so do you have any brother or sisters
Christina: 3 half sisters.
Jim: who (got cut off)
Christina: Hey I am watching a movie so I'll call you tomorrow or something.Jim: ok Later
To summarize this Carlos, your methods to getting there phone number is great. �The 3rd email may not get it, but it appears the next email will. �How do we handle these first calls. �Keep in mind they are 19-21 year old girls. �I am gonna have to at least talk to them on the phone twice before trying to set something up. �
Right now bro, I am discouraged. �Pick me up!:) �I need to be better prepared to first phone calls and first meetings. �I wish you have ALOT more info on those 2 areas. �After the second date, I think I can't take it from there......
Thanks Bro, enjoy the sun
J in PA
CONTINUED...
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CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE...
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CARLOS:
Ah yes, back from the sun again. Maui was hotter than Alabama asphalt... but it was a good heat.
Now, as for these girls you're hitting on... this is a great example of dialogue that we can break down and look at applying the Alpha Man techniques to.
First, you need to bust their chops more.
A LOT more. 19-21 year old girls need a LOT of energy in the conversation or they�re going to check out. You just can�t ask boring questions and get away with it.
AMP up the energy � big time.
Remember the "E" in REAL is "Effective & Energized."
The one thing I see guys doing wrong all the time is that they go into an interaction with a woman and have a lazy, lose, hanging-with-the-boys attitude that is SO uninteresting to younger women.
Girls have an attention span of a ferret on crystal meth, as I like to say. They need more stimulation than an eight-year-old that is hard-wired into his X-box.
Here are some new things to say. Start busting these girl's chops like this:
- Hey, are you one of those crazy chicks that sets up her Myspace page just so she can look popular?
- Hey, I�m calling you because your Myspace page looks like my kid sister put it together. Do you really like that band �XXXXXX�?
- Is it true that Myspace girls are all spoiled little sorority girls?
Get things riled up with them...
Be brave. What have you got to lose but a couple of cheesy ex-cheerleaders with no clue of how the world works.....
;-)
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QUESTION:
Carlos,
Man I know that someone has asked you this before, but for a refresher I was wondering when and what questions are good to dodge from women.
I was good enough to meet her and get her number, then once we started talking on the phone I felt as I was getting the third degree. For the most part I don't offer to much information at all.
She asked me where I worked work, my age, my middle name???, and the normal stuff you would expect when you get to know someone.
But I felt a few RED flags were raised on a few of the simple questions. Like where I work. I basically let her pull the information out of me. She asked me I told her the City, She asked again I told her the company, She asked again I told her the department and then I moved on to me asking her what she did. I don't think that I messed up too bad since she has called me again.
But, why should I have to apply and interview when I already have a job. I do realize that people in general place value on material things and that drives me crazy that I have to be something that I am not in order to win over a woman. I would like to turn the tables and put them on the spot.
My question is really how?
- Tony
Washington, DC.
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CARLOS:
Tony, I would love to give you a clear-cut, black-and-white answer for this, but...
Knowing what to answer when you approach women and she asks you a question is really more a matter of my question:
"Why is she getting the control of the conversation?"
That's what questions are, by the way. Sometimes an interest indicator (I emphasize SOMETIMES), and sometimes a tool of keeping you on the defense, but the reality is that the one who is asking the questions controls the conversation.
You don't need to worry about ducking the questions if you're the one asking them.
And you don't have to worry about them if you're the one answering them and you feel confident asking them.
Natural conversation (something that is almost impossible to have in most bar and club situations) mandates that it should flow nicely, back and forth. Like waves on a pier.
But it so rarely does. Instead, it does tend to become a struggle for control.
The question is also not what questions to avoid, but can you just sit there and not answer her, confidently?
The question is: WHY do you feel you must answer?
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CONTINUED...
______________________
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And your best defense is, how do you answer without answering?
Why not ask her: "Wow, you sure are curious. Is this a test? How am I doing? I sure would hate not to pass this one." (With an air of delicate sarcasm.) "Don't worry, Suzie. There's no need to rush. I'll probably live in this city for at least another year or so." Smile.
Always go into a conversation with the knowledge that YOU control it, and YOU can walk away at any time, and anything she says can NEVER challenge your worth or sense of power.
Learn more about conversational control when you Approach Women
Powerful men don't try too hard. They know how to influence a woman by demonstrating their internal strength in certain ways.
Do you want to start learning how to dramatically improve your self-confidence with real, time-proven methods?
Are you ready to drop that lame "Nice Guy" routine and start showing her a real Alpha Man?
If you'd like to learn more about REAL Game and the successful attitudes of an Alpha Man, you should take a look at the program that will put you on the path - The Secrets of the Alpha Man.
http://www.alphaseduction.com
Just remember: Every man is self-made, but only the SUCCESSFUL admit it.
I'll be back with more advice soon ...
- Carlos Xuma
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The secrets of compelling communication and persuasion are easy to learn.
Most guys don't approach women because they haven't got the SKILLS to APPROACH WOMEN. Once you have them, you'll feel less anxious and you'll actually DO IT.
It's time to learn the TRUTH about women ... and attraction.
It's all about your Inner Game...
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Discover your inner Alpha Man - NOW
Click HERE to learn more...
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Listen to what the other gurus are saying about Carlos' work...
"I've read every book and studied every system on dating. The problem with most 'gurus' in this field is that they're not teaching men how to build a solid foundation. Until you change your internal belief system and adopt an Alpha mindset, all the
tactics and techniques in the world aren't going to do you any good. (Actually, it's like learning just enough karate to get your ass kicked!) Carlos Xuma is the best there is at teaching men how to develop their 'inner game.' From
there, he'll give you the complete set of tools for approaching women, and life, with absolute confidence and skill. If you're in this game to win it, these are the rules you need to learn."
- "Supreme", M.A.C.K. Tactics co-creator
"Carlos Xuma is a man who has a clear passion for imparting the success with women he has experienced to other guys worldwide. He approaches his craft with immense integrity and a distinct style!"
- Scot McKay, X & Y Communications, DeserveWhatYouWant.com
"Carlos Xuma is the REAL DEAL! If you are serious about creating an extraordinary relationship. You will learn more about the needs and desires of women than they do themselves! I highly recommend
Carlos to any man who is ready to get the woman of his dreams. I love his game, its 100% real."
- The Dean, Dating4Men.com
"Carlos Xuma is one of those rare guys in the field who actually GETS what interacting with women is all about. His advice goes beyond the pick-up lines and approach techniques that so many guys use and fail with. Rather, Carlos gives guys everywhere practical,
valuable advice that will make men attractive not just for one night, but for many, many years. He lays down the foundation for becoming a NATURALLY attractive man, full of confidence and the ability to fully ENJOY being around hot babes.
Unlike other pickup artists, Carlos shares information that helps you not only in one area of life, but in many: in social relationships, at work, sports, with personal goals. He'll help make you a well-rounded, self-believing alpha MAN who's capable of just
about anything. And seducing gorgeous, high-quality women, is just the beginning."
- James Brito, How to Be Irresistible to Women
"Carlos Xuma is one of the few men in the 'seduction' or 'attraction' community who digs beneath the surface of passing attraction, and Explores what it is to be a man who attracts women by virtue of his character and, consequently, the natural outward expression of high character.
He brings words like 'discipline' and 'integrity' to the forefront, and waddya know, those are exactly the qualities women truly crave in a man."
- Grant Adams, CEO - net2bed.com
"Hey Carlos, I write about the biology of men and women's behavior. You seem to know the biology of behavior without knowing it. How do you do that? You have a deep intuition of dynamics - it took me 7 years of academic research to discover. And you find sharp ways to apply it practically... Keep up the good work, brother."
- Joe Quirk, Author of "Sperm are from Men, Eggs are from Women"
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