 |
|
 |
CARLOS XUMA -
DATING ADVICE FOR MEN NEWSLETTER: |
The TRUTH About Dating and Attraction...
|
Friday, 1:20 AM: Carlos Xuma's Desk...
|
|
QUESTION:
I am recovering from an ex... but I want to see others. I don?t know how to do it! It is incredibly frustrating to be so unsuccessful with women. I don't know how to approach them or how to talk to them! I like this girl at the gym, she's a lifeguard there and a very nice girl (from what I hear) So how do I start a conversation with her?!?!?! What do I say, what do I do?!
Do you know how I can stop being so scared of girls? I still miss my ex after breaking up with her in November. It is quite pathetic but I don?t know what to do! I still call her, and it hurts me to death to hear her talk about other guys and stuff! I know if I had a girl I truly wanted I would not even think twice of her. WHAT DO I DO, PLEASE ALL ADVICE IS NEEDED.
CARLOS:
Dude, really. Stop begging.
The tone of your voice screams: "I'm losing control! I'm a wimp! I'm turning into an emotional blob of she-male!"
Do you need a slap? 'Cause I'm ready to give it to you...
First, let me take a guess at something ... SHE broke up with you. How do I know this? You don't need to be a therapist to see that you're suffering from 'she-broke-my-heart' disease And I'll hesitate another guess that just before the end you probably came on too strong and she started to distance herself. You got more clingy and needy, leading to the eventual breakup.
One thing you'll learn in detail in the e-books is that you need to learn when and how to take a break. You need a recuperation period after any romantic entanglement. I call this the recharge period, and it's vitally necessary for many reasons. The most important is that your self-esteem is in the crapper. That's why you feel the urgency to hurry up and get back out there and meet new girls. You're running a dialog in your head (below your conscious awareness) that makes you believe that since you lost this relationship, you might not get another woman again EVER.
It's not true, man. You did it once; you can do it again.
|
|
- You can't be a whole man until you learn how to live and be happy WITHOUT a woman in your life. Period.
Your recuperation starts here and now. Engage your self-discipline and do the following:
- Stop calling her. Yeah, I know you're probably falling victim to that compulsive voice in the back of your head that wants to know "Is she seeing other people? Do we still have a chance?"
If you stay in contact with her you'll only wind up begging for her to reconsider, then tearful mementos at her doorstep, and further supplication on your part. It all ends up with you crying in your drink in some pub with a 300 pound bartender named "Large Marge."
- Take a few weeks off from women - COMPLETELY. Don't give them a second thought. Don't pressure yourself into picking up or throwing out lines or anything. If you approach Lifeguard girl now, you'll probably blow it because of all this anxiety you've created for yourself. Take a little while and get your game together.
When you're ready - Tease her. Tease to Please. Some people call this being cocky and funny, or negative hits, or whatever. The concept is mostly the same, only with my particular flavor. Here's how it works:
- Never introduce yourself with a compliment to any woman's physical appearance. The good looking ones hear it all the time, and the less attractive will smell your game like month-old milk.
- Find something about her that you can tease. If it's her hair color, maybe her roots are starting to come in: "Hi! You know, I was wondering if the two-tone look was coming back. I was thinking of dying my roots blonde." And give a very obvious sly smile that says you're yanking her chain. Don't be cruel, but don't be afraid to get a little Edgy. Most guys wimp out at this point.
Those of you who got the e-book know how to use this in detail and how to qualify a woman to your requirements - NOT the other way around.
Try to deliver whatever you say with a playful tone and a smile. Make it as humorous as you can to take the edge off. (This is the key.)
CONTINUED...
|
|
CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE...
|
|
Teasing is perfect because it calls back to those days on the playground when you were pulling her pigtails and calling her "Pandy-Sandy! Your head is full of Can-deee!" Girls take this as a challenge to their self-image (as do men) and it evokes an interesting dynamic from them.
Try it and observe it. Men who treat women like they're not attracted to them (i.e., are not in a woozy, starry-eyed love spell) have MORE SUCCESS WITH WOMEN. Watch any man who gets results and you'll see what I mean.
You have to risk a woman's wrath before you can get her fully engaged in you. If she gets pissed and stalks off, she would have been a downer to hang around with anyway. Can you imagine getting hooked into a miserable relationship with a woman totally lacking a Humor Gland? It boggles the mind, dude. Shoot me now.
The problem most guys suffer from is NOT that they don't know what to say or do. You're really suffering from a fear of REJECTION.
You could say just about ANYTHING to her and it will be better than saying NOTHING and beating your head about it later. You doubt your own abilities. Stop making women so important, and you'll start to lose this anxiety.
You know, I go into oodles and oodles of detail about this and the underlying psychology of dating, posture, attitude ... the A-Z of dating and the male-female dynamic, in my e-book The Dating Black Book.
Wouldn't it be great to learn how women REALLY think and work?
Wouldn't it be fantastic to finally put aside your fears of them once and for all? Approach women anywhere and anytime?
|
|
The cure for this kind of fear is the TRUTH.
(Remember: FEAR= False Evidence Appearing Real.)
Education leads to understanding. Understanding leads to better choices. Better choices lead to better results.
And results are ALL that matters when it comes to the game of women.
I can show you the way to better results and success with women, and it's all in my e-book - THE DATING BLACK BOOK. You need to download it from here:
/ebookstore.htm
You'll get answers to questions like:
... When is a woman playing you or REALLY interested?
... How do you stop being strung along for weeks and weeks by women, and how do you turn them on to you instead of you being turned into another girlfriend?
... How do you meet MORE hot women?
... How do you get them attracted to you right from the start?
... How do you stop paying for dates that go NOWHERE?
|
Really, do you want to go through 2004 without this powerful knowledge? Do you want ANOTHER year of confusion and poor results to stop you from getting what you deserve?
It's almost April already. How much better are you than when the year started?
The year is 1/4 over.
25% done.
How have you improved?
You see, I believe that EVERY man deserves to have a woman by his side ... and three or four if he so desires. I've devoted my life to helping people and training them for more and better success.
I've talked to guys the world over who have made a REAL difference in their lives by taking the first step on the right path - learning. Once you understand, your world opens up.
|
CONTINUED...
______________________
|
|
Ask yourself: Do you want to wind up in your rocking chair whining about all the things you SHOULD have done?
Seize this opportunity. It's time to start WINNING.
/ebookstore.htm
Don't forget - The Advanced Audio Coaching Session 6 is ready NOW to take your current skills and take them to the limit... with the rest of our special guest interview with Cathy, who tells you from the women's point of view exactly what they want from men. Go to the web page to hear a 3 minute excerpt from the program.
Imagine having a coach giving you tips, strategies, and a complete breakdown on how to improve your technique and success with women - firsthand. You can listen to this audio RIGHT NOW on your PC or Mac, and you can even use your MP3 player to take the learning and go mobile.
The monthly audio series is OVER 100 MINUTES of advice and explosive tips, and it's available for download at:
/audioprog.htm
-Carlos
|
The secrets of compelling communication and persuasion are easy to learn.
Most guys don't approach women because they haven't got the SKILLS to APPROACH WOMEN. Once you have them, you'll feel less anxious and you'll actually DO IT.
It's time to learn the TRUTH about women ... and attraction.
It's all about your Inner Game...
|
Discover your inner Alpha Man - NOW
Click HERE to learn more...
|
| |
Listen to what the other gurus are saying about Carlos' work...
"I've read every book and studied every system on dating. The problem with most 'gurus' in this field is that they're not teaching men how to build a solid foundation. Until you change your internal belief system and adopt an Alpha mindset, all the
tactics and techniques in the world aren't going to do you any good. (Actually, it's like learning just enough karate to get your ass kicked!) Carlos Xuma is the best there is at teaching men how to develop their 'inner game.' From
there, he'll give you the complete set of tools for approaching women, and life, with absolute confidence and skill. If you're in this game to win it, these are the rules you need to learn."
- "Supreme", M.A.C.K. Tactics co-creator
"Carlos Xuma is a man who has a clear passion for imparting the success with women he has experienced to other guys worldwide. He approaches his craft with immense integrity and a distinct style!"
- Scot McKay, X & Y Communications, DeserveWhatYouWant.com
"Carlos Xuma is the REAL DEAL! If you are serious about creating an extraordinary relationship. You will learn more about the needs and desires of women than they do themselves! I highly recommend
Carlos to any man who is ready to get the woman of his dreams. I love his game, its 100% real."
- The Dean, Dating4Men.com
"Carlos Xuma is one of those rare guys in the field who actually GETS what interacting with women is all about. His advice goes beyond the pick-up lines and approach techniques that so many guys use and fail with. Rather, Carlos gives guys everywhere practical,
valuable advice that will make men attractive not just for one night, but for many, many years. He lays down the foundation for becoming a NATURALLY attractive man, full of confidence and the ability to fully ENJOY being around hot babes.
Unlike other pickup artists, Carlos shares information that helps you not only in one area of life, but in many: in social relationships, at work, sports, with personal goals. He'll help make you a well-rounded, self-believing alpha MAN who's capable of just
about anything. And seducing gorgeous, high-quality women, is just the beginning."
- James Brito, How to Be Irresistible to Women
"Carlos Xuma is one of the few men in the 'seduction' or 'attraction' community who digs beneath the surface of passing attraction, and Explores what it is to be a man who attracts women by virtue of his character and, consequently, the natural outward expression of high character.
He brings words like 'discipline' and 'integrity' to the forefront, and waddya know, those are exactly the qualities women truly crave in a man."
- Grant Adams, CEO - net2bed.com
"Hey Carlos, I write about the biology of men and women's behavior. You seem to know the biology of behavior without knowing it. How do you do that? You have a deep intuition of dynamics - it took me 7 years of academic research to discover. And you find sharp ways to apply it practically... Keep up the good work, brother."
- Joe Quirk, Author of "Sperm are from Men, Eggs are from Women"
|
| |
|  |