The TRUTH About Dating and Attraction...

Thursday, 11:42 PM: Carlos Xuma's Desk...

QUESTION:

Yo Carlos,

WASSUP? Well, one of my friends recommended me to you about a few months ago and I must say you definitely know what you are doing because I have a friend who naturally applies some of your principles. Now, I on the other hand have trouble with women.

I am 19 years of age and want to start approaching women, but the fact is that I never have had any type of success with women. Every time I see a woman I would like to approach, I get a little nervous and am afraid of totally screwing up. I have a fear or something.

Now, my question to you is what is the BEST way to eliminate this fear and nervousness? Should I just DO IT and not give a dam if I totally mess up or what? What do you recommend?

P. S - I have never really approached a woman before in my life, so I have to get this handled. Carlos, thank you man, I appreciate your generosity.

CARLOS GIVES YOU A LITTLE MOTIVATION:

Well, first of all, I'm glad you're making the effort to take care of this BIG part of your life.

Guys don't really stop to think very often just how important success with women is to them. Unfortunately, this winds up blinding them later on in life. High 5 to you for getting control of this NOW, while you can still shape your habits.

I'll give you a short and a longer answer:

YES, you should just DO IT and ignore the fear.

You see, that's the quickest way to overcoming it. A famous soldier was once asked how he was so fearless on the battlefield. He said he wasn't fearless at all. He was so scared he almost crapped his pants every time, but that he didn't let the fear STOP HIM.

That's the critical difference. Not that you'll ever totally erase the fear, but that you find a way to act in SPITE of it.

Ah, but it's not always as easy as it sounds to just DO IT. There's a lot of mental machinery trying to undermine your ability to act, and your self-esteem plays a large role in it.

So how do you act in spite of it?

You have to RE-FRAME the meaning of the event. The reason that you're feeling scared when you approach a woman is that years of bad social conditioning has left you believing that women are some kind of MAGICAL and SPECIAL creatures. Perhaps that they are almost PERFECT.

Let me assure you from past experience, they do all the nasties that men do. They're FAR from perfect. They poop. They pick their noses. And when they get really really drunk, they hurl just like guys.

Not pretty?

Well, it should serve to knock her off her pedestal a bit, which is what you MUST learn how to do if you're going to have long-term success with women.

Right away, I urge you to complete your understanding of this subject by downloading my e-book.

You'll be glad you did.

CONTINUED...

CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE...

QUESTION:

Thanks in the past for replying to my mails. It always helps. You are the man! I love your latest e-book and am using it as a guide for self-improvement.

Thanks for pointing out so many truths and empowering the male species.

I have another one for you, bud.

Here's my story. I met a girl I really like and I kinda sensed something was wrong. She seemed to be into me but I couldn't tell for sure. I shortly found out that she was engaged. To say the least, it pissed me off.

Her friend broke the news to me because she supposedly didn't have the guts. I put it under the rug and moved forward and somehow bumped into her again. I experimented to see how that would result and talked to her.

She told me she dismissed me as a possibility because I cut off contact with her and wasn't replying to my messages. She had that very same day broken up with her fiancee and called it off.

I moved and forgot about it and she tried to contact me without my knowing and when I found out, she told me that because I didn't contact her, she got back together with her ex. We are sort of dating but she is engaged.

She told me that she doesn't want to break his heart and he lives far away and bought her a plane ticket and a wedding ring. She really feels pressured because he went out on a limb for her. I told her that it's never too late to make up her mind and she agreed but she has a tough time following through with it.

I like this girl and I know for sure that she likes me too. Chemistry is there for sure. But what the hell do I do? I don't think it's going to work when she gets there but she might give in to not hurt anyone. I'm not an a$$hole but I don't want to get shafted. I told her if she came back and her heart wasn't open, it would be the last time she'd hear from me.

What advice do you have?

CARLOS TELLS YOU WHY WOMEN ARE SO PASSIVE:

Passive?

Yes, women are very passive about their roles in relationships. They will typically not handle things directly. They prefer to play the more passive role.

They really don't like confrontations, either.

I've had women like this in my life, and I was usually better off without them.

You will be, too.

Yes, I can imagine this is incredibly frustrating from your point of view. After all, every time you want her, she's not available. And she never let's you know she's interested when she is.

One day she's with him, the next she's not.

On/Off

Hot/Cold

Yes/No...

Which is it?

She just doesn't sound like stable material to me. And if she's willing to "give in" and marry this guy just to not hurt someone, well that's plain messed up. That's how lives are ruined. Small sacrifices just to avoid confrontation or trying to avoid dealing with reality.

Imagine ten years from now when she's given up on this guy and figures out that it's time to leave him. The pain she'll incur. Imagine if she has a few children and then decides after a few years (after her pain has built to an intolerable level) to just dump the whole thing and go back.

And now you should thank your lucky stars that it won't be YOU going through that instead.

This girl is lost. She's letting herself do something out of guilt and fear and completely ignoring her own desires. Don't try to rescue her or save her. Some people need to make certain mistakes before they'll ever learn.

She's also showing bright red flags here in that she seems to be waiting for an emotional rescuer to swoop in and save her day. She's still a little girl that needs other people to make her big decisions for her, apparently.

The toughest thing is to watch someone you care about make bad choices for themselves. It sucks, but you can't save them or fix them. That's not your job.

The way you need to look at this is this: Do you want to be playing this role for her for the rest of your life?

Do you want her always falling into predicaments that you have to help her with, or that she has to go to you to make her big-girl, grownup decisions? Nope. I didn't think so.

And I don't buy that "you weren't around, so I fell back on the closest available guy" thing, either. That's so lame.

Ultimately, I'll bet you that this thing doesn't work out with her and this guy.

Let her go, let her make her mistakes, and let her learn from them. That's the best thing you can do for her right now.

Then, and ONLY then, will she be suitable for you to come back to.

You're not being an a$$hole. On the contrary, you're doing the RIGHT thing! You're engaging your self-preservation mechanism.

Don't let anyone tell you that you're being a jerk for not helping her drive herself off a cliff on this one. Don't believe that taking care of yourself is a bad thing, either. Look out for your own emotional safety while doing the best for others that you can.

You've done everything you need to. Now let her go and move on to your next step in life. There are other women you need to be dating. If this girl gets her head on straight, then fine. Until then, it's business as usual.

Repeat that after me, everyone... "BUSINESS AS USUAL!"

Don't be one of those guys who keeps letting the woman back into his life while she continues her self-destructive habits. You've got a life of your own to go live, and she's got a lot of growing up to do.

I GUARANTEE you success if you do what I recommend, and follow the simple strategies I've got for you.

Ultimately, you're just going to have to learn enough about what's going on to get that upper hand.

If you want to get that kind of understanding and control, you need to download and read my e-book. And you can get the benefits of my best e-books, RISK FREE for the next 90 days.

That's right, guys... You can now download the first, last, and best books you'll ever need on understanding women and dating from Dating Dynamics with NO RISK at all.

Download my books, read them, review the strategies, and put it to work for you right away. If you don't feel that it's the incredible, insightful, and invaluable tool I've made it out to be, you can simply ask for a refund.

I wrote them in a simple, easy-to-use format that ANYONE can learn. Nothing is complicated, and there's no dumb hypnosis routines to learn. Just the stuff that will help YOU get more success with women. E-books are easy to read, and they're easy to search for certain points you want to refer to over and over again.

Here's the complete catalog of what you can download from us - and be reading TONIGHT:

THE DATING BLACK BOOK - This e-book set covers the dating scene, from meeting women, to your best attitude, to strategies, to dumping them when you need to move on. Looking for a girlfriend? This book shows you the BIG picture.

Put this link in your browser to download it (you may have to put www. in front of it): datingdynamics.com

THE SEDUCTION METHOD - This e-book set covers the seduction scene, from finding and meeting women, to strategies, what to do in bed with her. Looking to get laid? This book shows you how it all works.

Put this link in your browser to have a look (you may have to put www. in front of it): seductionmethod.com

SECRETS OF THE ALPHA MAN - This e-book and CD coaching covers your inner game, from meeting women, to cultivating complete confidence, to life and success strategies, to understanding what the winners and Alpha Men in life have that you can have, too. Looking for a better lifestyle and inner confidence, as well as more women? This book shows you a map to a more successful LIFE.

Put this link in your browser to see all the great stuff in this set (you may have to put www. in front of it): alphaseduction.com

And if you're like most guys that love to hear advice and audible examples of things to learn by, and you want new and fresh tips every single month, The ADVANCED AUDIO COACHING is something for you to get.

Each month we go into loads of detail about every aspect of dating and seduction. From what to say to what to wear, to what to cook, to what to do when it's time to close the deal. Every session is over 100 minutes of top-quality digital audio that you can download and listen to right away. No waiting for a CD to ship!

We've been going strong with this series for over a year and a half now. That's eighteen months of great, timely advice.

Put this link in your browser to check it out (you may have to put www. in front of it): datingdynamics.com/audioprog.htm

There are dozens of guys out there trying to pull in a fast buck selling you their books on speed seduction and the like. And some of them are decent quality books. But a LOT of them are just a waste of time. I think you guys can tell I'm not.

I'm in this for the help I can give you, educating men to do better in their lives in the one thing that has eluded us for thousands of years - SUCCESS WITH WOMEN.

CONTINUED...

______________________

Is there ANYTHING more important?

Time is running short for all of us, no matter how young or old you are. Don't waste precious years of your life learning by trial and error (and perhaps not learning at all).

Remember life is too short, and death is too long.

Don't wait until your heart is broken before you take steps to learn how this game is played.

Get the information on how to improve your dating life TODAY. Make the changes you need to make to get the love, sex, and relationships that you want and DESERVE to have.

If you've ever found yourself saying, "I don't understand women!" then our e-books will finally give you the knowledge you need to finally understand. I'm telling you, it's like getting a book that describes how a certain magic trick is done that has fascinated you for years.

I remember when this realization hit me, and how excited I was. I stayed up that night writing out how I'd use the knowledge to improve my dating life. It wasn't until years later that I got around to writing the book on it, but I finally did it.

All my experience ... my heart and soul is in these e-books and audio programs. I just know you'll enjoy them.

I'll be back with more advice this week...

Here's to 2005 -- the year for you to get busy and get successful with women!

- Carlos

alphaseduction.com
datingdynamics.com
seductionmethod.com

"Carlos, it's so simple man. I'm an alpha man and have been my whole life... just without knowing some of the clear distinctions that you have outlined in your ebook. Your book is a really powerful for a guy like me who has been studying his stuff his whole life, so for all the new guys this will be super powerful, mind-blowing stuff! It will almost too good to be true for some guys... I can already see the difference in some interactions within minutes of reading your book... I do feel kind of sorry for my secretary though because I've gotta keep my pen out of the company ink! Keep up the great work!" - Tim from Toronto, Canada

"Dear Carlos, Your program is a "killer..."
It helped me to get rid of many traits of the so called "nice guy" - shyness, indecisiveness, "ass-kissing", etc.
... It boosted significantly my love and sex life. Not only [this] ... It helped me to be more successful in doing business, I can now easily spot when somebody wants to "walk over me" and try to make me submissive as usually women do. Thanks a lot!
My best wishes to you!"
- S.D.
Sofia, Bulgaria

"I LOVE your Secrets of the Alpha Man program. It is by far the best overall e-book and audio program online that I have read....and I have done my research and read all the popular e-books and what not.

"I already was having a lot of success prior to the program but my success has doubled since reading the e-book and listening to the audio." - D.

"Hey Carlos, I have been reading your book "Secrets of the Alpha Man and it is absolutely life changing ... I mean seriously I don't even read it as a mere book anymore - I will use it as my personal reference guide for true manhood for good ...

"[I've been] studying your book and already seeing results..."

"Thanks, your work is really having a wonderful impact ... I have to admit that your work is the only material that I trust as far as internet products ...

"A loyal Reader - T.G.

P.S. Keep up the good work and keep those great e-books coming !"

The secrets of compelling communication and persuasion are easy to learn.

Most guys don't approach women because they haven't got the SKILLS to APPROACH WOMEN. Once you have them, you'll feel less anxious and you'll actually DO IT.

It's time to learn the TRUTH about women ... and attraction.

It's all about your Inner Game...

Discover your inner Alpha Man - NOW

Click HERE to learn more...