The TRUTH About Dating and Attraction...

Thursday, 5:25 PM: Carlos Xuma's Desk...

AUDIO NOTICE - Guys, Audio Session 6 was just released last night. It's ready for download - and it's SMOKIN' hot... You need to check this out...

Over 100 minutes of audio coaching, including the conclusion of the special guest interview with Cathy:

- Interview conclusion
Do women need drama?
How Women read into things - hyper-interpretation
What is a "jerk"?
Why Bad Boys are so good - Charged behavior
The blurring of gender roles, and how it affects your dating and seduction
How long for the first call?
Who should pay for the date?
Why it's critical that you be persistent
- How to keep a woman interested over the long-term - the tactics that will make her yours for good
- The reasons she will stay with you, and why she'll quit you
- Why conflict is necessary, and why most guys end up turning into controlled chumps
- Self-development and the Seducer - What you need to be reading and listening to for maximum growth, and how to keep your positive attitude when the world is trying to bring you down.
- Repetition and your subconscious - the twin powers of training
- Understand a New Reality - The role of perspective and understanding in learning from your successes and failures, with the "Round World" example
- The complete guide: How to handle breakups

You can see the full contents at:
/audioprog.htm

Audio subscribers should have received their download link over the weekend.

QUESTION:

Dude as usual your stuff is bang on.

Here's the issue.

I've been dating a 20 year old girl for two and a half monthes. At first, I was seeing another girl then decided to make it exclusive with the younger one. I'm much older - not 40 but getting there.

I kept it loose -not seeing her more than twice a week, although everytime we're together it's wild monkey-love. Question is - how do I see her more often and still keep her interest from dropping?

S

CARLOS:

20 years old!?! Why, you dirty old man! She's old enough to be your ... love-monkey.

All seriousness aside, isn't it great when you can take your pick?

And isn't it even cooler when you can bed the younger gals? Just goes to show you that not all women have a problem with older men. In fact, many PREFER them.

So you want to keep her interest up. This is a really great question, and a very interesting situation, because it has a compound affect.

First, if you start seeing her more than 2 times a week (really more than one time a week) you start the part of her brain that thinks: "Hey! This is a RELATIONSHIP." She'll automatically consider it a boyfriend-girlfriend sort of thing. Which doesn't sound like a problem from your end since you agreed to exclusivity with her.

But beware that things change when it goes from "wild" to "regular."

Now, the other side of the coin, which you seem to have figured out is that a girl this age is going to be looking for NOVELTY. She's going to have what I call "Short Attention Span" interest in you.

I won't kid you, it is going to take some work to keep her interest going. You're going to have to be willing to party with her (if she's that type.) You're going to have to keep her from getting bored with the same old thing. (I suggest working your way through the Kama Sutra, since she sounds like she's not uptight. :)

I suggest also a small prescription of inconsistency or irregularity in your contact. If she calls you a lot, or emails you, lower the frequency, and increase the duration between contacts a little more than might be comfortable. I also recommend you let HER be the one to suggest an increase in frequency of your get-togethers. If YOU do it, you'll risk appearing too needy and clingy, and it won't work.

Ironically, the more you can hold back from seeing her, the more she will want to see you. Part of the reason it's still wild monkey love is that you haven't worn out the novelty yet.

Remember, your accessibility is a function of your value to her. The easier something is to get, the more we take it for granted. Seeing someone more frequently will be a delicate balance.

Just remember that everything new eventually becomes old.

Enjoy her while you've got her, but don't fall into the mode of obsessing over keeping her. Remember that those things we hold most tightly tend to slip between our fingers.

AND - if you remember your Aesop's Fables, sometimes it's not so smart to kill the golden goose....

CHECK THIS OUT: We got a smoking review at the Get Sexy Now review page ... these guys review all the dating and seduction e-books, and we got raves. Here's what they had to say:

"Over 200 pages of very serious, very beneficial advice. Mr. Xuma has put together an extremly good study course here that is informative and easy to read. He understands the fundamental flaws in most men's behavior when it comes to their lack of success with women and his book does a damn good job of setting them straight. Get Dating Dynamics and learn about 'The Big Trap', 'The Three Stages Of Continuum', 'What Women Really Want', 'The Female Sex Types' and much, much, more. This is a good read and will definitely help you in your quest to please women! You also receive 3 bonuses when you get Dating Dynamics..." (Rated - 5 diamonds)

Yeah, it's a shameless plug, but if you're still sitting on the fence about the e-book, you need to jump off and get it.

NOW.

CONTINUED...

CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE...

QUESTION:

Dear Guru,

I had a wonderful relationship with a wonderful lady who is a mother of two sons. She is 8 year elder than me. I'm 26. While we were together she had a very positive opinion on me comparing to his husband and former lovers. Not only her but also her female friends and her mother told this to me.

She is divorcing now but live separated for 3 years. When we started relationship she was living separated only for half a year and this was one reason why we broke [up]. The other reason was as time went by and know each other better I lost control over my emotions and ended up in becoming a whimp. We were together for 15 months. We broke 15 months ago. We stayed close friends and we had been colleagues from the beginning till now. Now both she and me are changing our jobs.

She haven't had any romantic relationship since me. Only a 13 year younger mormon mission[ary] caught her interest who already travelled back to America. Nothing physical happened between them but they were and may be still on same mental level via e-mail. He is away for 5 months. He converted her into mormon. During the 15 months we are not together I still haven't found a girl like her. She has a wonderful personality with a very attractive appearance.

Since Xmas time we blabbled more and had a good time. And in last 3 weeks we had much fun and had a really good time together in bank where we worked. Of course I used the tactics learned from your book. I know partly she lost her interest in me was that I never teased her. Now I tease her "cruelly" and recent couple of weeks she started to tease me back. It was amazing to see how your tactics proved to be true.

The other day she celebrated her name day (similar like B-day in Hungary) and I gave her flowers in the evening. She must have liked me cuz during talking she touched my arm several times. More than 50% of time we held eye contact and other non-verbal communication showed me her interest.

All time long I tried to be neutral so to be a challenge for her and compliment her only a few times when we were watching her new photos on computer. She haven't invited me in her house for 7 months "due to" the affect of this mormon guy. Now it looks like I can visit her in next weeks cuz she had problems with computer and need to reinstall some programs.

And of course I would like to go back into her bed and even more...

So beside the tactics in your book what special advice can you give me in order to win back her heart?

I do know from my own experience that it was very hard to get her interested in me again but I wanna go on cuz she was my really special one and as I mentioned above I haven't found a girl like her since we broke.

Thanx in advance,

T - in Hungary.

CARLOS:

Smell that, guys?

That strange, deathlike odor?

Sorta desperate-smelling, and probably familiar.

It's the smell of "One-itis."

The dreaded disease that makes men believe in scarcity instead of abundance.

(And it seems it's a global phenomenon, too. They even get it in Europe.)

This affliction affects all men at some time in their lives, and the thinking is something like this:

"Wow, she's a great gal. I'd like to have her as my one and only, and because she isn't insecure and needy for one man, I want her MORE. Mostly because I'm afraid of losing her, thinking (irrationally) that there is no way I could find another woman like her. I'm blinded by my own belief that there are only a few women out there. And this belief jeopardizes every encounter I have with a woman, because I've got the smell of desperation on me."

And it gets worse and worse, as the man looks for evidence to back up his belief that there are only a few women out there he can get. And so he spirals into doom by giving one woman too much attention.

The AFCs (average frustrated chumps) out there all contracted "One-itis" at some point, and they never got better. They caught the bug and never recovered. The path to wimp-dom is paved with the bodies of chumps out there who simply HAD TO win this one woman. And, in the process, this freaky obsession scared her off even more.

I would also advise that you never tease "cruelly." I have never coached you guys to do that. You must only tease in a way that makes sense for your target. If she's exceptionally attractive, you avoid acknowledging her beauty. Avoid complimenting her at all.

Behaviors like this add up to the posture you're trying to build.

I love it when guys write in asking for more, when they aren't even using the e-books to start with. There's enough information in there to win any women you want, but I'll bet my glow-in-the-dark condoms you read it only once and put it aside. The Dating Black Book is a tool. A reference book of the Alpha Man attitude.

Dude, *I* even pick it up and re-read it regularly - and I wrote the damn thing!

Pick it back up and read the "Psychological Principles" chapter again.

Let me give you a nickel's worth of free advice, as the old-timers say...

First, SURE nothing physical happened between her and the missionary-man. Did SHE tell you that? Or were you with them all the time?

Next, stop being so bland and neutral with her. Maybe I'm reading too much into your words, but "blabbing more" does not increase attraction. In fact, the more you "blab," the more likely you are to become a "friend" in her mind. Friends talk, but lovers engage in ... shall we say, more affectionate behavior.

Flowers, huh? Try this on for size instead: Get her a sexy book. Get her a funky hat with a propellor on top. Get her a crazy car air freshener shaped like a naked woman.

Get her something that says "clever." "Different." "Imaginative."

Even "wacky."

Let me give you an example of what I gave a gal I was seeing for Valentine's day: I hid a small packet of chocolates in her apartment, with a note that gave her a clue as to where another note was hidden. She had to track down 3 of these notes to find the last one, where I gave her a web page to go to with a joke about her traveling to Europe, so she couldn't experience what I'd planned for her until she came back and got together with me again.

She wrote me back gushing that it was the nicest thing anyone had EVER done. She called me at least twice to tell me that, too.

Now did that have impact? Oh, you bet your ass it did. Let me tell you that the "thank you" I got when she got back from Europe would have curled your toes up to the back of your head. In fact, I got a couple "thanks" out of it, if you know what I mean.

Wink-wink. Nudge-nudge. Say no more.

Three sticky notes and a bag of chocolate.

Cost? A few bucks.

Effect?

PRICELESS.

You must cure your feelings of scarcity before that smell of desperation clouds your mind.

Let me ask you something -

Wouldn't you like to have enough women in your life that you aren't scared about losing any particular one?

Wouldn't you like to have a dating and seduction life of ABUNDANCE, where you never feel as if you're desperate or needy?

There is a cure for this.

Would you like a vaccination that will cure your potentially terminal case of "One-itis"?

It's called getting the TRUTH.

Education leads to understanding. Understanding leads to better choices. Better choices lead to better results.

And results are ALL that matters when it comes to the game of women.

Have you tried buying her dinners and flowers?
Have you tried confessing your feelings?

Wouldn't you like to know why that didn't work for you? (And never will...)

I can tell you why, and it's all in my e-book - The Dating Black Book. you can download it here:
/ebookstore.htm

Wouldn't you like to know:
... when a woman is playing you or REALLY interested?
... how to stop being strung along for months and months by women, and how to turn them on to you instead of being turned into another girlfriend?
... how to meet MORE hot women?
... how do you get them attracted to you right from the start?
... how to stop paying for dates that go NOWHERE?

These were questions I wanted answers to for YEARS, and I finally decided that I was going to get them. I started reading all the books in the bookstore on the topic. When I realized they didn't have the information I needed, I started looking for books that talked about pickups and techniques and the "taboo" information that you couldn't find anywhere else. (I started this before there was an Internet, but not TOO long before. :)

When I got as much information as I could find (and that wasn't a lot) I started trying things and experimenting. I got rejected and blasted, and occasionally I also got LAID. I watched why people did things and noticed how they influenced how other people perceived them.

I have spent years and YEARS out there getting battered, deep-fried, and served up as a meal ticket in the world of dating, and there's no reason why you should have to.

CONTINUED...

______________________

Really, do you want to go through 2004 without this powerful knowledge? Do you want ANOTHER year of confusion and poor results to stop you from getting what you deserve?

It's March already. How much better are you than when the year started?

You see, I believe that EVERY man deserves to have a woman by his side ... and three or four if he so desires. I've devoted my life to helping people and training them to more and better success.

I've talked to guys the world over who have made a REAL difference in their lives by taking the first step on the right path - learning. Once you understand, your world opens up.

"Thank you, Carlos, for putting the Dating Black Book together.... Instead of promising supersonic seduction with canned speeches, you tell it like it is so you can get results by being yourself � thank you... I have spent hundreds of dollars on other 'information' and yours covers the most topics ... no theory-only B.S. here.

"It would take you hundreds of hours, thousands of dollars and lots of heartache to figure out what Carlos has done for you. If you have ever wondered why the jerks get all the girls - you need this book."
C - Milwaukee, WI

The top-down strategies are EXACTLY what the Dating Dynamics e-book (and audio series) will teach you. Not only do you learn what the subtle psychological aspects are, but how you can AMPLIFY these "ALPHA MAN" traits so that you are able to draw in the women that you want. The only magic you have to add to this equation is the attitude to take action.

Are you tired of finding women that seem to be interested, and then they seem to get distant and all you get is a peck on the cheek and a "let's just be friends"?

Do you want to take the woman that you've lost and get her interested again?
Do you want to make sure you handle it RIGHT, from the start?

Get understanding so that you can make 2004 the year you took care of yourself and started being REALLY successful with women.

Life is a LOT shorter than you think.

Ask yourself: Do you want to wind up in your rocking chair whining about all the things you SHOULD have done?

Seize this opportunity. It's time to start WINNING.

/ebookstore.htm

Don't forget - The Advanced Audio Coaching Session 6 is ready NOW to take your current skills and take them to the limit... with the rest of our special guest interview with Cathy, who tells you from the women's point of view exactly what they want from men. Go to the web page to hear a 3 minute excerpt from the program.

Imagine having a coach giving you tips, strategies, and a complete breakdown on how to improve your technique and success with women - first hand. You can listen to this audio RIGHT NOW on your PC or Mac, and you can even use your MP3 player to take the learning and go mobile.

The monthly audio series is over 100 minutes of advice and explosive tips, and it's available for download at:
/audioprogram.htm

-Carlos

The secrets of compelling communication and persuasion are easy to learn.

Most guys don't approach women because they haven't got the SKILLS to APPROACH WOMEN. Once you have them, you'll feel less anxious and you'll actually DO IT.

It's time to learn the TRUTH about women ... and attraction.

It's all about your Inner Game...

Discover your inner Alpha Man - NOW

Click HERE to learn more...